Download the "CruciPeep" App Today! with Trixie and Katya

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Download the 'CruciPeep' App Today!"

Episode Information:

• Title: Download the "CruciPeep" App Today! with Trixie and Katya
• Release Date: April 15, 2025
• Hosts: Trixie Mattel, Katya Zamolodchikova, and Bob the Drag Queen
• Description: In this vibrant episode of The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya, the hosts dive deep into a myriad of topics ranging from personal hair struggles to unforgettable party experiences, all while delivering their signature blend of humor and candid conversation.

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1. Haircutting Woes and Beauty School Tales

The episode kicks off with the hosts sharing their tumultuous experiences with haircutting, highlighting the complexities and emotional toll it can take.

• Katya's Mishap: Katya recounts a humorous yet frustrating incident from her beauty school days. While cutting a client's hair, she accidentally gave a beautiful, masculine men's haircut to a female client due to being on autopilot. Reflecting on this, Katya says, “I just cut a gorgeous, square, masculine men's haircut into this girl's hair and sent her down to the chapel” (09:45).

• Bob's Perspective: Bob likens haircutting to "open heart surgery," emphasizing the skill and precision required. He humorously states, “I look at haircutting as, like, open heart surgery” (08:43).

• Shared Struggles: Both hosts agree that haircutting is a challenging craft, with Katya adding, “Haircutting is hard” (08:29) and Bob expressing disbelief at non-professionals attempting it: “Are they that stupid?” (08:32).

2. Navigating Homeowners Associations (HOAs)

A significant portion of the conversation delves into the frustrations of dealing with HOAs, highlighting the often arbitrary rules and lack of support.

• Katya's Fines: Katya shares her ordeal of being fined $250 a month for having a pink planter, illustrating the stringent and sometimes nonsensical regulations imposed by HOAs. “I was getting fined $250 a month because one of the planters on my patio was pink” (25:02).

• Bob's Rants: Bob vents about his experiences with HOAs, describing them as unhelpful and obstructive: “The HOA said you can go literally suck ass” (23:55). He further criticizes their negligence, stating, “They don't do nothing” (25:06).

3. St. Patrick's Day Party Antics

The hosts vividly narrate their wild experiences at a St. Patrick's Day party, filled with humorous and chaotic moments.

• Katya's Adventure: Katya describes attending a themed party where she indulged in excessive drinking, leading to hilarious encounters and accidental participation in activities she wasn't prepared for. She shares, “I bring a trough of vodka” (44:31) and recounts attempting to participate in an Irish dance contest while intoxicated: “I ran up there and got on the ground and started doing this” (47:05).

• Celebrity Encounters: A highlight of the episode is Katya’s meeting with actor Tim Bagley at the party. She shares her excitement: “I gotta tell him how much I loved the Comeback. Gave me a big hug” (49:48).

• Bob's Observations: Bob adds comedic flair to the narrative, mocking the party's structure and the notion of hiding leprechauns as prizes: “They have a hole dug, and there's a trowel” (46:21).

4. Fashion and Personal Style Debates

The discussion shifts to fashion, with the hosts debating the merits of bespoke tailored suits versus off-the-rack options.

• Katya's Fashion Choices: Katya admits her reliance on off-the-rack clothing from stores like H&M, expressing reluctance to invest in bespoke tailoring: “I have them from H and M” (32:27).

• Bob's Advocacy for Tailoring: Contrarily, Bob champions the importance of custom-fitted clothing, critiquing mass-produced garments: “Off the rack, it doesn't fit your body” (32:35).

5. Current Events and Social Commentary

The hosts offer sharp critiques on contemporary issues, blending humor with pointed social commentary.

• Cyber Trucks Vandalism: Katya and Bob discuss the recent trend of vandalizing Cybertruck and Tesla vehicles, mocking the over-the-top designation of such acts as "national terrorism." “They're trying to make vandalism to a cybertruck or Tesla vehicle... as national terrorism” (27:11).

• Holiday Dynamics: They also touch upon the commercialization and cultural mishandling of holidays like St. Patrick's Day, lamenting how such events can overshadow more meaningful celebrations: “But because Donald Trump announced... we're gonna fiercely do Irish Heritage Month” (52:25).

6. Personal Shout-Outs and Community Engagement

Towards the end of the episode, the hosts take time to give shout-outs and engage with their community, promoting positivity and support among listeners.

• Supporting Peers: Katya urges listeners to support fellow creators like Brittany Broski, highlighting her musical talents: “I don't know her business, but you gotta support the girls” (56:16).

• Interactive Segment: The episode concludes with a playful interaction where Bob and Katya perform impersonations and joke about their podcast endeavors, reinforcing their close-knit rapport.

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Notable Quotes

• Katya on Haircutting Accident: “I just cut a gorgeous, square, masculine men's haircut into this girl's hair and sent her down to the chapel.” (09:45)

• Bob on the Complexity of Haircutting: “I look at haircutting as, like, open heart surgery.” (08:43)

• Katya on HOA Fines: “I was getting fined $250 a month because one of the planters on my patio was pink.” (25:02)

• Bob on HOAs Being Unhelpful: “They don't do nothing.” (25:06)

• Katya on St. Patrick's Day Party: “I ran up there and got on the ground and started doing this.” (47:05)

• Katya on Meeting Tim Bagley: “I gotta tell him how much I loved the Comeback. Gave me a big hug.” (49:48)

• Bob on Tailored Suits: “Off the rack, it doesn't fit your body.” (32:35)

• Katya on Cybertruck Vandalism: “They're trying to make vandalism to a cybertruck or Tesla vehicle... as national terrorism.” (27:11)

• Bob on St. Patrick's Day Commercialization: “We're gonna fiercely do Irish Heritage Month.” (52:25)

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Concluding Insights

In this episode, The Bald and the Beautiful seamlessly intertwines personal anecdotes with broader social observations, all delivered with the hosts' trademark wit and charm. From the intricacies of hairdressing to navigating the pitfalls of HOAs, and the chaotic fun of themed parties, Trixie, Katya, and Bob offer listeners an entertaining and relatable exploration of their fabulous lives in Tinseltown. Their candid discussions not only provide laughs but also offer genuine insights into the challenges and humorous moments of their everyday experiences.

For those who haven't tuned in yet, this episode promises a delightful blend of humor, honesty, and the unique perspectives that make The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya a standout podcast in the realm of entertainment and lifestyle.

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Note: All timestamps referenced correspond to the points in the provided transcript and are included to highlight specific moments within the episode.

Transcript

[Trixie Mattel]

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[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Today's episode of Bald and the Beautiful is brought to you by Blissey. I gotta tell you, I received a Blissey pillowcase in the mail and it made my completely bald head feel very good at night. I wish I knew about this sooner. Satin is so bad for you, but Blissey's silk and it's an incredible game changer. I've been seeing a dermatologist in Beverly Hills. Yes, they're extremely curt with me and I feel ugly, but it's very helpful. And the dermatologist told me to ditch cotton pillowcases for Blissey silk and you'll see less fine lines and healthier hair in weeks. I noticed for me, my face gets so ripped up from drag that anything I can do to help my face recuperate and rest is very helpful. You'll see healthier skin and hair in just a few weeks. And it's better than satin, which is made from synthetics. It's rougher on your hair and skin and it's cheap for a reason. Blissey has anti aging properties, reduces fine lines and wrinkles over time. Also, can I just say it looks really princessy and you feel like a beautiful little girl. I mean that's, that's a big part of it for me. And it's clinically proven not to clog pores, unlike cotton, antibacterial hypoallergenic and it promotes better sleep. But it's still completely machine washable and it's Mother's Day and you know your mom. If I know your mom as well as I do. She loves to sleep and her hair and her skin is jacked. So let's help that that lady out, okay? Voted the best love gift of 2024, it's also a good gift because, you know, it's kind of like everybody goes to sleep at night, but you don't necessarily know what size pleather miniskirt people want. So it's a great gift. Featured on Live with Kelly and Mark, the View, Oprah Daily and Good Morning America. Over 3 million sold. Because you're a listener, Blissey is offering a 60 night risk free plus an additional 30% off when you [e-mail] baldpod that's Blissey B L I S S Y.com baldpod and use code baldpod to get an additional 30% off. Your skin and hair will thank you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Take your plans out of the group chat and get long weekend ready in new Abercrombie. From day to night, pack new outfits for every part of your itinerary. Grabbing brunch, throw on the A and F mila dress, then head to your dinner reservation in their new bubble hem mini dress. And yes, permission to overpack for pics with the girls. Abercrombie's best selling scarlet skirt deserves a post in your feed. Your plans are worth it. Shop Abercrombie's new long weekend collection online or in store. Oh, is that a whip crack Taylor's Whip crack. Hell yeah. Shotguns.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Flashes shotguns. There's shotguns in. But it's great.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I love a whip crack shotgun.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So people will know when this comes out, I just. Vincent's going to come sing supermodel Trixie Cella.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Trixie, they're calling it. Trixie Cella. Trixie Cella they're calling it.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I did pick up a second gig, so I'm no longer going into financial trying to do.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You won't be going into the. You'll be rolling into Coachella in the red.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Do labs, don't pay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Don't. Oh, right. Do. Do labs. Do drag. Don't. Money. No money.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I would like to make a version of Afterpay or Klarna where, you know, I always almost say Klarma Klarma. Now I forget that it's not Klarma, it's Klarna.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's Klarna.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

After paying Klarna, I always, I want a version of that where you just don't never pay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's layaway, but you just, you buy.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

A lot of shit and then you just Dip to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you remember? Are you old enough to remember layaway?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah. Cause you know what it is? My mom would. We would get clothes on layaway for school at the beginning of summer.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Pay them off by senior year.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah. Cause she would buy the school supplies and shit when it wasn't spiked.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Smart, smart.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

She would buy our summer clothes when they were on sale. We were always a season behind. Cause you put the summer clothes on Lei Wei.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, wait, you had to wear shorts in the winter.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, not in fashion. Not like a last season. But like you buy your swim trunks in fall so that by summer.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. They're not marked up. I hate that. Also, I have stress dreams about buying books for college girl. It's like. It's the silent killer.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I've been watching.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They don't tell you about that.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I've been watching Buffy and I'm on season four and she goes to college and I'm watching her in the bookstore and I'm thinking, remember when your fucking Math textbook is $500 and it's the only.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was like, this is a racket to get that.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Guess who it's written by?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The teacher. Hello. Hello.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

That's so fucked up. Like, imagine if it was like, oh, if you want to come to our show, you have to buy our book.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Not available in any library. No, not available because it's only printed for this bookstore. So that you, the sucker, have to pay the mama. I'm not paying for that teacher's salary. Or that teacher's little jacuzzi, whatever.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You try to get the used too.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But the thing is $498. It's $500 new or $498 used. But when you return it, they give you $3. Make that make sense.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I'm struggling with my hair. No, it's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's not a struggle, it's a journey.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

This is one of the wigs from Solid Pink Disco. This is called He Him.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It looks like you look exactly like Ken from the Barbie movie.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It kind of gives pixie cut, though.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, kinda like, girl.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It kind of gets these to me, these points, like, if you are a gal, Rachel Leigh Cook style these and make them very like.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's like, Rachel Leigh Cook.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

This is an actress going into audition for Chicago but swearing she didn't dress up.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

She comes in like, do you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

With her flapper or her costume Flapper. Did you see which actress just got a pixie cut? Emma. Emma Stone.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah, Emma Stone.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Emma Stone.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Wow.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Not great.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Oh, I love it. She has such a pretty face.

[Trixie Mattel]

I mean.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, she's got one of those faces that. I love it when it's.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

She's so gorgeous. It's the.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The type of beauty that's like, I'm gonna just try and be ugly and they can't.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And, you know.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You know what I mean?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I'm kind of the sucker because when I see a girl with the short hair, I always give a compliment because it takes a lot of courage to cut your hair off.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Watch Top Model. These bitches are in ruin.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know. They give them third degree burns. They cut off all their fingernails. It's crazy.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Send them home.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Well, do you ever watch Veep?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, I never seen it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, my God, you would love it. But there's a. There's a really great episode where she comes back. I think it's after a season, and she's got a short haircut, and everybody's horrified because it looks awful. And she thinks it looks great. It's so funny. So funny.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's hard. I do love videos of people cutting their own hair. I love the moment of panic. I do love that type of shit.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Why do people think that they can cut their own hair? Can I say, why do people think that? I don't think that I can, like, do the electric in my. You know what I mean? I don't think I can, like.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Well, hair stylists know a lot more than you think they do. They're doing a lot more than just eyeballing your head and taking chunks of it. But I think people think that it's not super technical, that it's like, if.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You just, like, stretch it out and chop it, it's gonna look.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Haircutting is hard.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Are they that stupid?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I consider myself visually whatever and gay and beauty oriented. Haircutting for me in beauty school was so humbling. So humbling.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I look at haircutting as, like, open heart surgery. Same thing.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Same thing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I would never. I would take eight years of training for me to even begin.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I would never.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You know what they say in beauty school? They would say, because I was in beauty school, but I worked front desk at the Scot Free salon in Milwaukee. Hello. And the girls who, you know, I'd make their appointments, I take care of their clients, and they'd be like, well, you know, once you leave beauty school, it's years before you even have any semblance of saying, you know, how to cut hair.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And all you learn in the real world, all the patients you have to kill along the way. To get to that successful open heart surgery. Who are they? I would mess up, you know what I mean?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

One time we were doing. We were doing a women's. You know, when it's short on the top and then it's like a longer length. I mean, a lot of people do it, but like, you know, longer in the front, longer and then shorter than tapered. Yeah. One time I was just on autopilot and we had just done men's haircuts, and I'm cutting this girl's hair, and at the end of it, I just was like, think about my groceries, whatever. And I just cut a gorgeous, square, masculine men's haircut into this girl's hair and sent her down to the chapel.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Roan concert, men's warehouses.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And it looked. She was very pretty. And so I was like, well, it looks kind of cute on her. It's fine.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I don't think she was probably.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

She wanted some more length. And you want to save on. You want to save on the women's cuts, the pieces on the side, the front, to feminize and frame and all that. But when I worked at the makeup counter, the girls would come in, whenever they chop their hair off, they overhaul their makeup bag. Because a lot of women feel like once they lose their long hair, they don't feel as feminine.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They got to get a different license.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So. Well, like when women would shave their head, let's say they would come in and be like, I want to learn about lashes. Oh, I want to learn about a bold lip.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes. Yeah, that makes sense.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You know, they feel like their. Their hair is their femininity. A little bit.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

A little bit.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Not everyone.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I mean, if you cut Andrew Yang's hair off, I would say 30 to 45 seconds until he jumped from a roof of a very tall building.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah, cunty, cunty.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But it's like very. Its identity.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

But everyone wants to have the long hair, but no one wants to take care of it. We live in the air. We live in the era of the Dyson airblade. Just wake up 10 minutes early and do your hair. Oh, God, that salon look is so accessible now.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Dry bar. Get a blowout.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You know, get one of those TikTok head wraps where you wrap the hair up and sleep in that. Give us something.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I again, I love being bald and I'll never not love it. Yeah, so eat my ass.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I love. Can I say, I had Caleb Herron on the channel, amazing comedian star, and we were doing a game where I put wigs on him and I had to put a wig cap on him.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And I went, ugh. Doing drag with wig caps, girl.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's very Mrs. Doubtfire.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's very boop boopy doop. I don't know how to use my hands. Like it's all the putting wig. Trying to put a wig cap on a 22 year old girl with like waist length brown hair. Gorgeous, thick, like all one length for Halloween. I'm like, you figure it out, honey. You just figure it out. Because I can't do all that. You're like wrapping it up, you're smushing it and then you're trying to put the bald.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

The best thing to do really is a French braid or two French braids. Because then you can anchor the wig.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You have to do two braids and you have to go around like you got to do the crown.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Crown, crown.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Cuz then you stick the pins in that.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah. And then it's all anchored.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. But they don't know. They don't know that. They can't even, they can't even get around the, the geometry or the physics of a wig cap. They're like, who.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

What is this?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They're like when you put it on.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Your head, immediately flies off it. Like flies across the room.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's like, it's like they've. They can't wrap their head around it. Literally. They're just like, what do I. Whoa.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's like it's. They turn stupid.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They get, immediately they go to put.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It on and they act like it's their first day with hands. They can't stretch it over their own head. Nylon.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know what my head is. I'm not sure what nylon is. And I don't know where this hair is coming from. It's so crazy.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's crazy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They're always white.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Always.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's always white.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

That's the girls who struggle.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's a white girl. College books.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

College books girl.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I thought it would change at art school. Nope.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Was there an elective you took that you really liked?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I wanted to take photography, but it was too expensive.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Oh, you had to have a camera.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You have the lab fee. And the supply list for photography was like $2,000.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Oh my God.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

For the whole year. Like a thousand dollars a semester. I can't afford that.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Who can afford that?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Rich people, I guess. Rich people. That's the hack.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I hate rich people at college. Cause they're all there stinking it up with their Porsches and stuff. They're driving up and down Commonwealth Avenue in Boston in their little Porsches.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Generational wealth. Why are you here?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, they're there to support those broke ass teachers trying to get you to buy their $500 book. Cuz they get no financial aid. They literally create the endowment for the school, baby.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And the math book. What you do? Invent new math. Shut up.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And then they have the nerve to not even use it, baby. They don't even use it.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

They don't even use it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Never even. You never need it.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I can't tell you how many classes that was the case. You didn't even open the book. I. I took this class called Art survey where.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What does that mean?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You don't do art? You learn about all the different Art history. Art history. And you learn about different types of art by going to galleries. Part of the class of going to galleries. And I guess it was fine. I mean I'm not like a passionate visual artist. And so it was great for me because I know nothing about that. So I was like learning about gesso or underpainting or any of that chiaroscuro. Chiara mascuro. And it was the type of class where you could just go to the review day, take notes and then take the exam because there was no homework.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, fierce.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And after the first quarter I went, oh my God, I'm never gonna go to this class. So all I did was go to the review day rails of Adderall. I'm just kidding. I just paid attention. I just paid attention. And just. They shouldn't be that easy, sweetie. Shouldn't be that easy, sweetie.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Boston University. Let me pinch a picture. Weeks before 9 11. That has nothing to do with it. So Boston University. That is a.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's your alibi. Yeah. Well, if you know you can't afford $1,000 class, you're not buying a plane ticket either, honey.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Thank you. No. Boston University, intro to Psychology 101. I went to one lecture. I was like, nope, not going to this. Then again, showed up to the final multiple choice, 10 questions, eats.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Did you get it?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

100%, baby. Because it was. There was an intro to psych 101. It was literally common sense dot com. Anybody off the street could have been like that one. Yeah, that one. That one. Thank you so much. That probably cost about $13,000.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's crazy.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

My science elective. I tried to take Plants in Today's World because everyone says that was the easy one. And then I ended up taking diet and exercise. Oh, diet, nutrition.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's fun.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It was so interesting.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It was so interesting.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Did you guys talk about fad diets?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes. So as our big project, we each got to select a popular famous diet. South Beach, Atkins, whatever.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And you got to study it, learn about it and write a big study paper on it. And I chose the Subway Diet.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No way, baby.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's. Have I ever told you about this? No. I'm a PhD of the subway Diet. Obviously I don't pay attention to it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But, well, practice in theory. Yeah, Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I love Subway and I know that that's like a polarizing thing in this country because of the pito. No, people just some people are like, it's. They hate Subway. Oh, do you guys like Subway? See, it's very. Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, you know what though? I walk into a Subway, you know what I get? I get a foot long veggie with tons of salt and pepper and olive and oil and vinegar.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

The sleeper hit of Subway is the veggie.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Gorgeous. Bread with vegetables and toasted salt and pepper.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Toasted with cheese. Yeah. I love it.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Oh, you love that cheese, but no cheese.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

But I find it very filling and satisfying.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's del.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Ooh, it's del.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

The subway diet is two 400 calorie subs a day.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay. So that's called starvation.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

That's the whole diet. And there is no exercise.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, my God.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So you're just. Of course you lose weight because you're.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Malnourished, you're cross eyed and literally like bones sticking out.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So if you're trying to be really.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Wait, are you serious?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I'm dead serious.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

400 calorie to 800 calories a day.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Now this is what it was in 2010 when I studied it in a college class.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It might be like 700.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It might be woke now. Like now there might be actual, like go for a walk. It might be different. But what I do like about Subway is if you are trying to lose weight, it is one of the probably the best quick, fast foodie options where you actually have a say. Don't add this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Use the light maple. You actually can drive the calories down. Totally depending on what you get. Cause you can get a wrap and there's vegetables and there's vegetables. And if you're in the uk, they have soups.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So wait, Quick, quick, quick. Sidebar. I had a bread bowl of soup and I think that's just disgusting.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You told me about that. I'm sorry about that. A Panera one's so horny. The spongy wetness.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It was the texture. I Love the grip. I love the bread. It was the.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I think it's good. Oh, yeah. So this, the subway diet is 2, 4, 400 calorie, $400 if you're in college. It's $200 and it's 2, 400 calories. And then that's how you lose weight. And then I also. I did Slim fast for a while.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, God. Which is just sugar.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's two Slim Fast shakes a day and one real meal.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, my God.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

That's so. Breakfast or lunch, whatever. You have the 180 calorie slim fast and you're allowed two snacks, I think a month. Two snacks and then you can have one real meal a day. I did that for a while.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

When you say one real meal, like a full country buffet. Like three going back three times. Because that's what I would do because I'd be so hungry.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, it's just like a normal. Like a human burger, fries and a Coke. Not, I mean, brown rice and vegetables.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And so that's how that works, girl. I think we know today's sponsor is our friends at Chime. And everything is getting more and more expensive. More and more expensive. Gas, cars, house foods, Becky, Shirley, all of it. It's just. It's really, really wild. And I know you have to try to build some credit card credit in this world, but who wants to bring on credit card debt? But there's a better way. You can build credit with money you set aside and avoid interest or expensive debt with Chimes. Credit Builder card. It's a secured credit card with no credit check or minimum deposit required. I'm very country, and my grandpa taught me to never buy anything unless you could afford it. And then I. I turned 18 and moved out. And everyone was like, yeah, that's a fun idea, but you're still probably gonna need some line of credit. Start building credit and everyday purchases and regular on time payments with no annual fees, interest, or credit check. Get the Visa Credit Builder Visa credit card with Chime. No fees, no credit check. Use it everywhere Visa credit cards are accepted. Build credit and money. I like to use it with stuff like gasoline, buying flights. Just like boring, regular stuff, you know, because why not make the boring, regular stuff, you know, a little more beneficial? You can also get paid up to two days early with direct deposit. And it's awesome because you can get your money sooner. I know sometimes Friday cannot come soon enough, girls. And you can find any of the 50,000 free ATMs really close to you using the Chime app. It'll show you where they are and it's fee free. So turn your everyday purchases and on time payments and to step towards your financial goals with Chime Secure Credit Builder Visa Credit Card get started [e-mail] bald that's chime.com bald bald Chime feels like progress. The Chime Credit Builder Visa credit card is issued by the Bancorp Bank NA or Stride bank na Spot Me Eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply. Chime Checking account required to apply out of network ATM withdrawal and OTC Advanced fees may apply. Timing depends on submission of payment file. Late payment may negatively impact your credit score. Results may vary. Go to chime.com disclosures for details.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This episode is sponsored by ZOC Talk. Have you ever been to a dermatologist whose breath smells like deviled eggs and soup? Or a dentist who asks about your recently passed aunt but instead of letting you answer, shoves their fingers into your mouth and proceeds to tell you about his daughter's 9.7 million TikTok followers? Or an orthopedic surgeon who only has slots during the middle of the workday when you're completely tied up in the studio recording your latest Nash pop hit single featuring Bjork on the lead flute. I think we've all been there. Booking a doctor appointment can feel just so daunting, but thanks to ZocDoc, there's no reason to delay. They make it easy to find and book a doctor who's right for you. ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in network doctors and click instantly to book an appointment. They have over 100,000 doctors from literally any specialty, including orthopedic surgeons who will check on your bionic hip at 7pm after you're done laying down Bjork's insanely hot jazz flute solo right before the verse where you yodel rap to an ill beat from your best friend Hans, a famed glockenspiel prodigy from Berlin. You can filter for doctors who take your specific insurance who are located nearby if you hate driving like me, or find ones with specific office hours to match your insane recording schedule. And most importantly, you can find doctors who are highly rated by real life verified patients. You can even see their real time appointment openings. Choose a time that works for you and instantly book a visit with just a few clicks. Same day appointments are also available in many cases, which is absolutely brilliant. The best part is that ZocDoc is completely free to use. You can search and compare highly rated in network Doctors with ease. Which is why I love ZocDoc. If I can find a great doctor, so can you. And all because of Zocdoc. Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to Zocdoc.com bald to find and instantly book a top rated doctor today. That's Zocdoc.com bald Zocdoc.com bald do you.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Want to update the girls on the black mold? What's going on?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Listen, listen to this. I was gonna listen. Okay, you don't have to tell me what to do. I have headphones on connected to your microphone.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

The hair's throwing me.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I feel like.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know you wait. When young boys would. Would do that, but like instead of getting it out of their face, they put it in their face. Cuz they do the Justin Bieber. You know what I'm talking about?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I mean, turn the wigs around, Dina.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Dina, just turn it around for volume. Now you're a beetle.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You know what, it kind of gives.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Children of the Corn.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Elian Stritch or something.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I don't know, it does the ladies who lunch right here. Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You guys, you're. This is a pod. You can't see the wig.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I want to be buried in I saw P Disco.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

We have these little boy wigs on sale and these. This is the wig to get drunken boy. This is kind of like a little surfer boy wig.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's not gender, okay?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's not gender.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Hair does no hair, knows no gender.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Okay, fine.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's a pixie.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Let me tell you. The person who has this hair works at the Starbucks and they make those drinks.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's a. It's a short grift. That's a short grift hair. Imagine the grift.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So what's going on with the black mold?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, so I finally found a contractor, okay, this guy. And they went in. So he had, he had a. Got it. We got leaks, we got holes, okay?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Nene leaks.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Nene leaks. We got holes, we got leaks, we got wiki leaks. Wiki leaks. We got Julian Assange and what's his name? Name. Anyways, okay, the deck and the. The roof have leaks. That is con. That is the water intrusion factor, okay? The HOA said you can go literally suck ass. Why don't you take all your energy and go suck your own ass. We're not going to give you a red scent. It's like, thank you so much for existing, you pieces of damn.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

28 leaks later, you unhappy, girl. They got you. I actually think that these contractors are feeding water into your home and then showing up being like, do you leak?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. I was like, well, where's that? Why you have a hose in your hand? And why is it attached to the fire hydrant out there? I see the HOA is hand on ass in that. They're just. They have their hands on their asses all day. Not doing anything else, not helping me. Taking my $500 a month and then putting it into video poker or something.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Honey, The H. The HOAs are my. My one in LA is 400, and the one in Milwaukee is 200.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And let me tell you, what they do is jack motherfucking shit.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

They don't do nothing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They, I guess, pay for the trash. I got legs, I got arms. I got bags, baby.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

For a while, I was getting fined 250amonth because one of the planters on my patio was pink.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It has to be natural colors. That's the one, two fifty a month. Like eight months.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's hunty. And I bet their correspondence was via parchment. And then a carrier pigeon. You know, it was only during COVID.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Did I actually sit down and be like, what's this? What's this charge every month?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Love that shit. Love it. It's like cable companies where you look at the bill, it's like, fierce charge, cunty charge.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Poopy charge.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jared Leto charge.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Ms. Diva charge.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, it's this. I went to subway charge. What are these charges?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

In charge?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes. Yeah. Charles in Charge charge?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes. Large Marge charge.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes. So I. I got a contractor. I couldn't demo the deck. They said, no, you can't do that. I was like, well, great.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Mm.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Long story short. Too late. I. I go out after the first day we were working at Netflix. Come home.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

This just this week?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes. It's just the other day, I came home full of fear. I was like, there's gonna be some tarp situation like before with these jokers. Mama. The first signs of intelligent life on this deck. Clean, gorgeous, meticulous, nice. Need to work. We're in good hands.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's all. It's.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's gonna be good. It's gonna be great. I have faith. And it's gonna be extraordinarily expensive because the insurance. Barbara from Florida, she was like, you fag. I'm not giving you any money.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Bianca Del Rio is your insurance agent. She probably has great insurance.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

She should get Bianca Del Rio. I bet you she would have Taken care care of this whole situation.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know. She would have been the best project manager.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Hell yeah. Up at 5am Several people would have been fired already.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Yeah. Not even involved in the project. Get hired just to get.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So what did you do today? Fag. Unless they have a good answer.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Fired.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I want you to do an elon. I want you to send everybody who's worked on this project an email where they have to respond to five things they do.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Can you name five cunty things about you? Fierceness.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Did you see that? They said on. They're trying. They're trying to say that cyber trucks.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You never see with two people. That was. It was an interesting point that made this morning on somewhere. Think about it.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

They're trying to make vandalism to a cybertruck or Tesla vehicle. They're calling it national terrorism.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's so dumb.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Terrorism against America.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, because it's America's. It's like lighting the flag on fire, apparently. Wow.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Apparently.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That's got to be the stupidest thing I've heard all day.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Isn't that cunty?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. God, why are we so dumb?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's because. Because of her emails.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, that's right.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Because of her emails.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Chappaquiddick.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Because I don't. Because. Yeah, because her emails. Because she's a woman. Because this is more. But, Mary, I'm so horny for these videos of. It's so horrible to feel when I see videos of people being like, I can't believe these voting things. I voted this way. And I can't believe these things affected me. Yeah, I huffed all this to feel bad, but I'm. Yeah, I'm polishing my knobs so fucking hard and I feel bad that I'm that person because I used to have more empathy and now I'm just like.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, it's hard to sympathize with the huffers, you know, the huffing paint thinner all day. And at the end of the day they're wondering why I got a headache.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Right.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Stuff.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Well, all of that. What it spells is I was okay with this hurting someone else. Now it hurt me. Isn't that shitty?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Now there. There is people saying, well, you can be racist towards white people too, you know.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Right. I couldn't go to the gay bar that I would have never went to.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, I could. I know.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

What the fuck.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They didn't let me go to the gay bar and kill the people. Oh.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

The difference is I'm not trying to go to the hater church. They can see these titties and they can oil them up and suck on them. I don't give a shit.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know. I'm not trying to go in and handle those snakes. I'm not trying to go race those cars. I'm not trying to go shoot them ducks.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Race the cars, NASCAR. Oh.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Cause they are they Christian NASCAR 500, girl. Well, it's conservative, you know, Monster trucks.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah, monster trucks are cool. I have to say, if I in my whole life ever have an opportunity to drive a monster truck, I'm taking the opportunity.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I feel like you would and should incorporate that into your drag Persona.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Well, in high school, my brother was really into mudding. Do you know what this is?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is it four wheeling?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No. It's where people have these, like, souped up trucks that are on really high, like, big tires and like. Yeah. Lift kits.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Sure.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And roll cages and all that. And the. They put the exhaust on the top instead of the back so that they can drive through mud and puddles.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Jesus.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Kind of a country activity.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. That seems a little together.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And you drink and you stand around. You take turns driving through puddles.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Love that.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And it sounds dumb, but I have seen it done, and it is thrilling to see that machinery drive through mud.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Fast and furious. Tokyo drift. No, I think. I think cars. I've been thinking about cars a lot lately.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Speak on it. I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I. I know it's a pod and sometimes the things I bring are audio clips, so.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Hold on. I have something very important to share as well. Also, I want to see rabid granny so bad. If anybody's seen it, please chime in the moving rabid grannies.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Are you looking to grow closer to Mark Wal? I knew something was happening. Get over here.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Second.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Get over here.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What are you doing?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I'm just in the office.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Are you looking to grow closer to God? This lent always. What's up, you guys?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Bob the Drag Queen is here. If you're in the car, take both hands off the wheel and start clapping, please. I just want to quickly work. I've been workshopping my Bernie Sanders impersonation. Oh, cunty. It's not gotten much better. I think it's gotten a little better. But I just want to hear what your audience thinks.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, go. Go for it.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

While I do find humor and people finding enjoyment in pictures of me at Donald Trump's inauguration, I find it hard to see the humor in oligarchs taking over our entire US Government system. And I do think that big banks will not enjoy a Boyney Sanders Presidency. And it is a big problem when 98% of the wealth goes to 2% of the population.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, yeah. Give it like a B. I think it's C plus. We're working on my Robert Kennedy too Resonant. Oh, wait, can I hear.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Did you know that hot dog water can kill cancer? It's horrible. Political. Can you do anybody political?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I could do Martin Van Buren and.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I do want to hear it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, no. Maybe a Kennedy.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

That's a perfect. That's. That's how Martin Van Buren would have said that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. There you go. Thank you.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Millard Fillmore. Millard Fillmore.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Give it up for Bob the Dragon. You look great, by the way.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Love those green gauchos. Are those gauchos palazzos?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I wish I had personal style.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Look. Look at you.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, I'm. But he always has like a. I know. Less community.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Was wearing a suit. Yeah, he was wearing a suit at one point.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Bob always gives. And then when I have to go to an event out of drag, I almost am more stressed out because I don't fucking have nice clothes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Totally.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I don't have personal style.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, do you have embarrassed. Ask for help. Do you have a men's bespoke tailored suit yet?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

They used to fit.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you have a. Do you have a. You have a tailored suit made from scratch? No. Oh, you need to have one.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, I have them from H and M. No, no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

God, no. No, no, no, no. Not off the rack. I'm talking about. You go to a tailor, you select the fabric, they do all your measurements, they make it. You ever see tall?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Are you out of your mind?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No, I'm not.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I'm.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

This is very. This is like one of those adults people things of a certain bracket, age, age and wealth thing. It's.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So now you're cutting my money and calling me old.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was thinking, you old rich bastard, you need to have a bespoke tailored suit. I think bespoke and tailored is a little redundant. No, you'd like. You go get it made because off the rack, it doesn't fit your body. Off the rack fits nobody's body.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Can I say that when I'm about 10 pounds thinner, I always fit like the stock 6 foot tall version of. Sure. Because I'm not too skinny, not too muscly, not too anything.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I'm the mid.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I'm just mid.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, that's what. That's how they make manufactured clothes for the mid.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

They try to middle er.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They split the difference, but nobody's nobody, you know, Naomi Smalls. Well, six inch torso, eight legs.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

She probably has to have all her boy clothes made. Everything's a crop top.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Crop top.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

A church gown on her is a crop top.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Capris.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

She is so fucking stunning. If I looked like her and then.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She'S on a pot regular.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes, she's on a pot. I really thought it was like she came out and I was like, what is it giving like girl, there's no.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Substitute for going under the knife.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Just go under the knife. It's so c. She's so cunty.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know lips like this.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I saw her come on the pod when I was on break, didn't she?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She came in drags wet. She came in 8ft tall. I was so. I was actually flabbergasted. I was like, I like, she's so fucking pretty. Wet legs like she, she, she like sat down, slumped and her legs went like.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

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[Trixie Mattel]

This episode is brought to you by RO as you may or may not have heard, GLP1s are all over social media right now. You may think I'm about to make a joke, but for once in Ad read, I'm not. I personally know several people who've benefited from GLP1s and they're no joke. Everyone thinks it's all about the weight loss and looking fabulous, but it's honestly about so much more than that. Being overweight doesn't just affect your mental health or how you look to others. It can be damaging to your physical health in so many different ways. Heart disease, cardiovascular issues, high blood pressure, diabetes, the list goes on and on. Row now offers FDA approved weight loss vials for much less than most auto injector pens, and all without applying insurance or savings cards. Ro's formula, created by Eli Lilly, hits not one but two hormones to curb hunger, all with less nausea. If you think a GLP one might be a good choice, just your RO affiliated provider can help you understand if GLP1s are right for you and your goals. Plus, RO members have support throughout their entire journey. You can even sign up from the comfort of your home, which is massively convenient. There's nothing worse than having to drive halfway across the city to a fluorescent lit waiting room just to sit in an uncomfortable chair and do what you could have done easily at home on.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Your phone or laptop.

[Trixie Mattel]

While I haven't had the need for GLP1s, they are the right choice for a lot of people who need help with their weight loss. So if you need to drop some weight and want to achieve your goals for a lower price, join the over 385,000 people who've already chosen RO to access GLP1s, go to Ro Co Bald to see if you qualify. That's Ro Co. Go to Ro Co Safety for boxed warning and full safety information about GLP1 medications. This episode is sponsored by Hungryroot. Look people, I'm a podcast host, entrepreneur and part time swimsuit model. I don't have time to go to the grocery store and spend hours upon hours preparing and cooking a meal. If I'm not talking with Trixie on the pod about how to drive a car, trimming a new hedge fund, or standing in front of a mirror with a swimsuit on to practice my modeling, I'm figuring out how to get 15 minutes of free time to take a breath. It's precisely this insane schedule that makes me a adore the 15 minute meals from Hungryroot. Hungryroot is like having a personal nutritionist. They take care of the stressful meal planning each week by recommending delicious recipes tailored to your tastes, nutrition preferences and health goals. They make it easy to eat high quality nutritious food and achieve any diet or health goals by tailoring recipes to a variety of lifestyles from anti inflammatory to gut friendly, gluten free or dairy free, high protein and more. You basically tell them about your goals and preferences and they fill your cart with personalized recommendations that get smarter as they learn more about what you liked or didn't love. There's no high fructose corn syrup, artificial sweeteners or preservatives in any of Hungry Roots food and their top quality meat and seafood are free of hormones and antibiotics. Most Hungry Roots recipes can be made in just 15 minutes or less. Last weekend I made the XL Sirloin Steak Fajitas in. They were delicious. The grass fed steak melted in my mouth, the seasoning was perfect and best of all it took me 15 minutes to cook. It gave me so much extra time that I immediately put on another swimsuit and went right back to the mirror to do the thing I truly love modeling. I love hungryroot. Take advantage of this exclusive offer for a limited time get 40% off your first box plus get a free item in every box for life. Go to hungryroot.com bald and use code bald. That's hungryroot.com bald code bald to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for Life. Again, that's hungryroot.com bald code bald well.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I mean this is I guess the season eight we just had. Bob we talked about Naomi and Kim. You know Kim has been like hitting the gym really hard.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I saw her Jim Chi Jim Chi I Saw her, actually, I saw both of them. She go to those fuckers? Yeah, Naomi and Kim at high. Matt, like months ago.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Kim looks excellent. Kim, you look great. She told me she's been just really interested in fitness. She's been looking excellent.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Cunty. Well, she plopped her ass down right next to me in the stretching area and she is limber as hell.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah, she's huge. You forget how tall she is. That bitch is giant.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Large people. Large people. A lot of large people getting into skinny minis these days.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah, a lot. Well, Kim, I mean, Kim's my sister. This isn't a sex thing. Kim has such a good shaped men's face. She's got this like square jaw and these high cheekbones.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She's also very tall.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Out of drag, I just think is gorgeous.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. Pouring out for Kim's face. Pour one.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Pouring up for Kim's face. Come on. Kim's face. The mysterious face of Natalia.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Does she always look pretty? Did she always have that facility with makeup or was there a learning curve?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Zero. She would say that she looks like shit. Kim's looking like shit is like one of the. She looked great, you know. Can I tell you, I've been waiting to tell you about a party I went to because I think. Yeah. I went to a sex party with that wig on at the Petsmart. I fucked everybody at the TLC sex party. I went to the TLC theater and I watched my 9,000 pound librarian.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

90 day, 9,000 pound mom.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

90 day, 9000 pound mom. You know?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

God, I need to stop. I need to.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Getting bangs. The real story. The untold story. Yeah. And I went to this party for guess what holiday?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

March Madness.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

St. Patrick's Day.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, no.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So I had friends from out of town and my friends from out of town were like, hey, one of our friends in LA is throwing. Her boyfriend's throwing a huge St. Patrick's Day party. So we asked, since we're staying with you, can we have an invite for the whole group? So we all went, right? Me and the people. It was in the Valley, I believe.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Kind of like Valley Village.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Valley Village.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Valley Village, which is kind of like Burbank almost. Okay. So I go over there and we all wear green. And I didn't know what the vibe was going to be. I just knew that it was gonna be like a Valentine's like. Or like a St. Patrick's Day party. And I never been to an Irish themed event. Okay, You're Irish?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

What? I didn't know what goes on drunk at 11. Okay. So that was what we were doing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

But. And you know, I love to have a drink. Of course. Right.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you like to have several pints of Guinness?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I like to get Miss Sloppy Boots because I get sick.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You shouldn't go to that party.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

But I like to ride lightning. I like to get right up to the edge of. I want to be able to get drunk enough that if I go home and have, like, a sandwich, I can go to bed pretty much sober. I don't want to go to sick.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yep.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So I get there. Really fun at a house party. Few dozen people decked out, green everywhere. And the host, he had his mom fly in. She's 100% Irish, and so is the dad.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She's from, like, County Clare.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, they're just. They had a East coast accent. But originally, their lineage is all okay. All types of Irish food. They cooked from scratch.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is it good?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, it was all. Well, it was all meats. So I didn't have much, but I had some soup, potato soup. And I said, well, I guess I'll just cheat and eat the potato soup with the bacon bits in it. She goes, no, we made a vegan one just in case. So I got to eat the vegan Irish soup, whatever. Top of the barn and tell you, oh, what is the Irish thing?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

500 calories a day.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I have a little cup of soup.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's horrible. So horrible.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I have some of that. I go sit on the. Sit on the patio, and I'm sitting there, and I don't know anyone there except the people I came with. But, you know, I love to be a plus one. I feel so free when I don't have to greet anyone.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, sure.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I don't have to be gracious host.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, you can have Willy Nilly.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I'm taking.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And because I didn't know anyone at the party, I brought a lot. Brought a cheese platter, brought bottles of SO and then the people I go with grab the booze, and I carry the booze in, and it's a group of, like, adult older people, and they're all, like, having brienne crackers, and I'm having a brown paper bag, and I think I'm about to pull out, like, a bespoke wine. Tell me why. It's a giant fucking jug of Tito's. No one there knows me. And I pull out a huge hit, and I'm just like, hey, guys, let's get.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Let's get pissed.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And they're all like, kiss me, I'm Irish. Having, like, a Little bit of Bailey's. And I'm like, oh, it didn't get out of here. I brought a trough of vodka.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Who wants to do some keg stands, Right? Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So then I go sit outside. This guy, he goes. This guy next to us goes, so they actually hide leprechauns at this party. And then when you find them, you get extra prizes. I said, oh, shit. You know, I'm gonna love that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, I love shit like that. Festive.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Festive. And I appreciate the effort when throwing a party to do corny little shit like that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That. But okay, the question is, are the people?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So the guy next to me puts on an Irish accent and starts saying, like, once upon a time at this party, they'll hide the leprechaun the best. And then I'm listening, and I'm like, he's doing, like, a bit. He's probably a comedy person. I don't know who he was, but. And I was entertained.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was like, cool. Okay.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And then after he was done, there was a long pause, and I didn't mean it to sell this way, but you're gonna love this. A long pause after he did, like, this whole monologue of, like, and if you find it, your lucky blarney stones, our pot of gold will come down upon y. It's like a whole storyline. And I go, thank you for telling us, but I totally meant it. Nice, but it came out so cunty. And the guy just burst out laughing.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, my God.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

He goes. Oh, my God. He goes. He goes, that was the funniest response. He said, thank you for humoring me. And I said, I didn't mean it to sound like that. I just go.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're like, kudos for telling us.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Totally.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

So then, did you find any leprechaun?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

One near drunk. Okay, I have a drink, and it's strong, right. And I'm not eating a lot of the food. I didn't eat dinner. You got to remember to eat dinner.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Because suddenly you're blackout. You don't know how. Mind you don't know these people. I may be one of the drunkest people.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Are they straight?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And that's St. Patrick's Day. So gay, drunk is straight, hospitalized.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I'm probably a liability to everybody. Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So then it's time to go look for the leprechauns. So I take off my pants, but I get really. And I'm like, all right, let's go. So then they have in the backyard one of those little gardens, you know, where you Like a box where you plant.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And there's a hole dug, and there's a trowel. And I go, okay, I think that leprechaun's buried in there.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So. But I'm drunk. So I'm also like, am I drunk? Digging up their gladiolas? What the fuck?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Or their dead cats. Right.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Pet cemetery. So I go to dig, and this guy next to me goes, oh, I wouldn't go in there. I almost dug in there, and I kind of got. They told me probably not to, and I said, oh, okay. So I walk away. I turn around, this guy digs in with the trowel and finds the leprechaun. The same guy.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I wouldn't do. I wouldn't do that if I were ye.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I was so cooked.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Amazing. That's incredible. That's competitive.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So then later, there's another contest. They say, there's an Irish dance contest. Mind you, there's like a dozen people left.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, God. Did you dance?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I ran up there and got on the ground and started doing this. I don't know any of these people. I'm not invited. I'm not invited. I get on the ground, I slam both hands, and I go like this. And everybody else is.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You take off your clothes. You take off everybody else's clothes.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Everybody else is doing, like, you know, why do I look tucked? What's wrong with me? What's wrong with the front?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You're Ellen.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So I'm doing this, and then I don't win the contest. And that. They were straight people, so they were like. The songs that were playing were like, enya.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, and you're doing hip thrusts.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Well, so then that. I go, well, do you want me to. I'm a dj. Confident. So I go up to the host, I go, do you want me to put on a song? And he goes, yeah. So I put on C'est La Vie by Bewitched, that, you know, popular Irish pop song. You know, this.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That old Tavern jingle.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Say you will, say you won't. Say you'll do what I come on.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Of course, anybody who's Irish knows that one.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Put that on. And I get up there and I hit that thrust so hard. And in that moment, I go, I only know the people I came with.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That is so brazen. That's Irish. That's very Irish, though.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

But everybody was so nice. And then later, I said, I had so much fun, like, this was so great, and please invite me next year. And they said they would.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, so the jib. True.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

This is the Real kicker on the party. Guess who is there?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Conan O'Brien.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, not Conan O'Brien. You know, he's a giant tall person.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Mindra O'Shanahan. Who?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Patrick O'Flannery.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know. That was my. The black trans. Annika the black. She is a black trans woman. In her alter ego on Instagram is Mindra O'Shannon. She says she's black Irish. It still appears. Okay, sorry, go ahead. So, okay, who was there?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Hold on. His name is Tim Bagley.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That sounds really familiar.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

He was in Grayson Frankie.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Tim Bagley, this guy. Oh, yes. He's invest in show.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, he was Michael McKean, wasn't he? Michael. No, no, no. He's in. He's in. He's so funny and so soft. Like, who is he just in?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Well, he was in. He's in the Comeback. He plays the caterpillar in the Comeback. That's like. This costume is so hot.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What else is he in?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

He's in Grayson Frank. He's a Will and Grace.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Grace and Frankie. I remember him. And Grayson Frankie.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

He's really just been in everything.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Very funny.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And he steals the show and everything. So I said, I gotta say hi. So my friend meets him and then says, my. And then says, my friend wants to meet you. And he knew about tricks.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Did he know about.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It was so nice.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I bet it would. Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And I said, I gotta tell you, I watched the Comeback like, twice a year, and there's a scene where you're dressed as a caterpillar and you're complaining about how fucking hot it is. And I said, in drag. I always think of you. And he was like, oh. He's like, well, we love that show. He said, do you know who else is here? He said, let's go tell Michael. Michael Matric King.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, no way.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Because it's an Irish party.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, duh.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

All the Irish people. And so I got to tell him how much I loved the Comeback. Gave me a big hug.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Did you ask him why he didn't cast you in AJ and the Queen?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I said, oh, you did AJ and the Queen? Yeah. No, I didn't ask, but I knew that. I knew that he knew you because I said, oh, you did that with Katya. Because he loves us.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, he's great. He did sex in the shitty.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

He was so nice. I was so starstruck. And it was really cool for me. That's great type of Irish party. Why weren't you there, McCook?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, well, that's. We're actually technically Scottish, but Irish. It.

[Trixie Mattel]

Boston.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

St. Patrick's Day.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Stay away. It's. It's West Hollywood. Halloween.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. What goes. We're dying. We're dying. The Charles Green. She's already green. She's already green. The river.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We're dying the river. Green. She's already green. You know what I mean? Like, we're doing green stuff. We're. We're being obnoxious. At 9am we're getting full blackout. By 11am we're face down, panties up. By 3pm there's a parade. Nobody remembers it. It's full chaos.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Just white people misbehaving.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. It's white people being. It's white people at their worst. It's the worst of the whiteies. Whitey Bulger. It's horrible. It's really. It's really horrible. And also hate crimes.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Love that, Tom.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It's not a great gay. It's not a great gay friendly holiday, typically.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

What did you do for. What do you do for St. Patrick's Day?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What was I doing for St. Patrick's Day? It was on a Monday.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah, well, this party was on Saturday.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay. Nothing.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Okay.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Face down.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I have. I just. I love a Christmas party. I love a Halloween party. I've never been to a theme St. Patrick's Day party. I did have fun.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Okay, well, there you go. Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And it was fun that real Irish people were cooking real Irish food.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What other holiday would that be like? What's. Is it like, equivalent to. What's another holiday.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Party or something for adults? I don't know. The weird thing, though, is because Donald Trump announced that, you know, we're not flying pride flags. We're not flying, you know, like, we're not doing Black History Month, but we're gonna fiercely do Irish Heritage Month. It did feel very. It put a small damper on my experience.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

But that's not the fault of the party host. It was a. It was fun to go to a house party.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Irish people, well, they're partiers.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah, I.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

When I hiked through Ireland, it was great.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Why?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

It was so green was this like. You hiked the year 2000? Yeah. Instead of hiked across Ireland?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Me and my friend Megan, we skipped. I skipped my graduation from art school and went hiked in Ireland. In Scotland.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You graduated from college in 2000?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

2005. And then I skipped graduation to hike the West Highland way.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You graduated from college 2005.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Mm. No shit.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

That's fucked.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I graduated high school in the year 2000.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

That's so FUD.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I was. It was. I was. It's been longer than I was that age. You do the math. Born in 1982.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Fiercely old.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Old as hell. So old that is like, that looks like my younger sister up there. Damn old.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Any positive. We're wrapping up here. Any positive shout outs?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I do, yes. I just want to. I want to clear the air and address the situation in that little Instagram clip that Courtney act had the gall and audacity to call out on the online. She said, did you put the baby filter on this? And I said, excuse me.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Right.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I did. Did you notice you looked great, like a little baby of me? Yeah. We were talking and I like tried to subtly throw it in there. I don't know if you knew, maybe you didn't notice. Hold on.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I would like to shout out, is there a baby?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You didn't see that?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

That's a baby filter.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It doesn't look that different.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

I know.

[Trixie Mattel]

Thank you.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

It's because we're bald.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, that's true. Oh, I do want to shout out Gwen Stefani for being so religious.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Girl, girl, do you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Do you wanna grow closer to God with me this Lent? Download this app and pray with me every day. And let's get closer to God through this app.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Can we listen to it? It's so crazy. Looking to grow closer to God this Lent. I'd love to invite you to join me in praying every day leading up to Easter on the Hallow app. I love this app and I use it every day for Lent.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

They're doing this incredible 40 day prayer challenge.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

You'll join millions of Christians around the world, including the incredible Mark Wahlberg, Jonathan Rumi, Father Mike Schmidt, and so many more in meditating on Jesus weight. Fuck off.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yep. Well, I did do the transcendental meditation course. I didn't tell you that. It's very, very boring.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Where do you find the time? All this premium cable, all this smoking, all this transport. Oh, yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No more smoking. No more smoking.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

All this cable.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

20 and 20 could save your life. 40 minutes a day. Are you looking to get closer to God this Lent? Join me on the Hallow app.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Can I say, it's so crazy. You know what?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

She looks incredible, but she looks like. She looks like a Barbie that is there to. To convert your children from gay to straight.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Her looks have never been the issue.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

No.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I guess I feel I didn't. I didn't expect that person who makes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That mistake to be a televangelist. Essentially.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes. It kind of is a hard left for me.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Download this app and get closer to God with me during Lent.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And I guess I have no issue with it. I mean, if she wants to be religious, is it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is it identical for her? Yeah, I guess so.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

But I'll shout out Ms. Brittany. Brittany Broski has been releasing music. This probably isn't three weeks.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Is it religious music?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

No, she does type of singing type stuff. Would you like to hear?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah. That's her.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Damn, she sounds horrible.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

So go listen to the girls.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

That looks great.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Women are not one thing. She can be hilarious.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

And an incredible musician. And I gotta tell you, I don't know her business, but you gotta support the girls. Go listen to. It's a. It's a cover of that Harry Styles song, Watermelon Sugar. No. Adore you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Adore you.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes, because she's a big Harry Styles fan.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Oh, really?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I think she's trying to reach him one song at a time. This is her extending the rose.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Hello.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Hi.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

How are you? What do you think? About. Do you know about. Oh, God. What is his name?

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Fuck off. Thank you.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He did the backflip off the comp. Not off the computer, off the piano. Benson Boone.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

He does a backflip off a piano all the time.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

He's always flipping and kicking.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Oh, wait, did he do it at the Grammys?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Okay, I did see that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Let people sing. Let people do backflips.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

If the body is T, you must set him free.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Well, there you go. All right.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Goodbye.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Happy St. Patrick's Day.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yes.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Drink less at other people's houses.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Yeah, maybe no hip thrusts for the first couple hours on the porch in.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Front of his mom. What the. While a Bluetooth speaker plays a song I picked. What the is that?

[Bob the Drag Queen]

You started, like, 35.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

35 years old.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

We can reorganize these bills.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Let me just go get in bed at your house. Like, so rude in front of. Hi, Michael Patrick King. I'm just thrusting.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Will you help me make this bed? I'm gonna rearrange the furniture in this room.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Oh, goodbye.

[D]

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[Bob the Drag Queen]

Hi, this is imho, the podcast. That's Darby and I'm Darby. And I'm Alexis. Hey, Darby, what does IMHO stand for? I'm so glad you asked. In my homosexual opinion. That's right. In my homosexual opinion, the podcast answers your weird questions because. Because we have weird answers.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And we also want to hear all of your stories. Maybe there's a situation you've been put in and you just don't know how.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

To get out of it.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Well, we'll get you out of anything.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Yeah.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Or maybe you've seen a dead body. Yeah, I need to know about that.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

I would actually love to hear about that.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Alexis and I, we are professional podcasters. We've made all the podcast charts and now we're ready to make your podcast Hearts. Okay, we know you need a new.

[Katya Zamolodchikova]

Podcast to be obsessed, obsessed with and.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

What'S more obsessive than two drag queens talking into microphones? So listen to imho the podcast. Anywhere you get your podcasts, it's in my home. The show.