Tammie Brown's Tallywhacker Extravaganza with Trixie and Katya

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya

Episode Title: Tammie Brown's Tallywhacker Extravaganza with Trixie and Katya
Release Date: July 8, 2025

---

Introduction to Provincetown and Performance Experiences

The episode kicks off with a lively discussion about performing in Provincetown (P Town), a renowned hotspot for drag shows and LGBTQ+ culture. Trixie Mattel, Tammy Brown, and their guest, Ryan Reynolds, delve into the unique challenges and vibrant experiences associated with hosting and performing in this bustling locale.

Notable Quote:
Ryan Reynolds [21:55]: "Well, I haven't gotten the COVID of the little local magazine yet."

---

Challenges of Finding Accommodation in P Town

The trio shares their struggles with securing affordable and comfortable housing in Provincetown. Ryan recounts his misadventures with exorbitant rental prices and inadequate amenities, highlighting the high cost of living that often deters performers.

Notable Quote:
Ryan Reynolds [13:07]: "My summer is. It's renting. It's $20,000. And then I put the money deposit down everything. It's a little bungalow."

---

Memorable Performances and Show Highlights

Tammy Brown reminisces about past performances, including chaotic yet memorable shows that became legendary within the community. They discuss the dynamics of putting on a successful drag show, emphasizing the importance of energy and connection with the audience.

Notable Quote:
Tammy Brown [14:06]: "So, they just sleep with both legs in the air. They get pickled."

---

Wig Culture and Aging in Drag

A humorous segment unfolds as the hosts discuss the evolution of wig styles and the realities of aging within the drag community. They touch upon the maintenance of wigs, the trend towards hard-front wigs, and personal anecdotes about managing gray hair.

Notable Quote:
Tammy Brown [07:08]: "I do like eyebrows. I'm just saying I like other parts of the body. Colored hair. So would I hate colored pubes? I don't know."

---

Navigating Show Failures and Resilience

Trixie and Tammy open up about less successful performances, sharing candid reflections on what went wrong and how these experiences shaped their approach to future shows. They highlight the resilience required to continue thriving in the competitive drag scene.

Notable Quote:
Trixie Mattel [35:46]: "Yeah, yeah."

---

Engagement with Fans and Community Support

The conversation shifts to the importance of building and maintaining a strong relationship with their fanbase. They discuss strategies for engaging with fans, promoting their shows, and the impact of community support on their careers.

Notable Quote:
Tammy Brown [60:12]: "Well, you were on there recently on the sofa."

---

Future Projects and Collaborations

Looking ahead, the hosts hint at upcoming projects and potential collaborations. Ryan expresses interest in expanding his performances, while Trixie and Tammy discuss plans to evolve their shows with more visual elements and storytelling.

Notable Quote:
Ryan Reynolds [53:05]: "It's a feeling of love. Ethereal, so to speak."

---

Closing Thoughts on the Drag Community and Industry Trends

In their closing remarks, Trixie, Tammy, and Ryan reflect on the current state of the drag industry, addressing trends like increased sponsorship and the balance between artistic expression and commercial demands. They advocate for authenticity and staying true to one's unique style amidst evolving industry standards.

Notable Quote:
Tammy Brown [35:50]: "You don't want to surveill the whole time, assuming."

---

Conclusion

"Tammie Brown's Tallywhacker Extravaganza with Trixie and Katya" offers an engaging blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and insightful discussions about the intricacies of performing in Provincetown's vibrant drag scene. The hosts provide a candid look into their experiences, challenges, and the enduring spirit that fuels their fabulous lives in Tinseltown.

---

Notable Advertisements Skipped:

• RO Insurance Checker
• Mint Mobile Promotions
• Airbnb
• BetterHelp
• Lululemon
• Venmo
• Home Depot

Note: Advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections have been excluded to focus solely on the episode's substantive discussions.

Transcript

[Trixie Mattel]

This episode is sponsored by ro. Ever feel like getting a prescription for Ozempic or Wegovy as a full time job? Between phone trees, hold music and paperwork. Who has the energy? Especially when the goal is better health? That's why there's RO. RO's free insurance checker slices through the red tape. Snap a pic of your insurance card, hit submit and relax. Within days you'll get a clear, easy to read report showing whether Your plan covers GLP1 medications. No paperwork, no negotiating, no elevator music Purgatory. So ditch the phone maze and focus on you. Visit Ro Co Bald today to see if you're covered and take the first step toward a healthier lighter you without the hassle. Go to Ro Co Bald for your free insurance check. That's R O Co Bald to see if Your insurance covers GLP1s for free. Go to Roe Co Safety for black box warning and full safety information about GLP1 medications.

[Tammy Brown]

Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. Now I was looking for fun ways.

[Trixie Mattel]

To tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited Premium Wireless for $15 a month is back.

[Tammy Brown]

So I thought it would be fun.

[Trixie Mattel]

If we made $15 bills, but it turns out that's very illegal, so there goes my big idea for the commercial.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment.

[Tammy Brown]

Of $45 for three month plan equivalent to $15 per month required.

[Ryan Reynolds]

New customer offer for first three months only.

[Tammy Brown]

Speed slow after 35 gigabytes of network's.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Busy taxes and fees extra see mint.

[Trixie Mattel]

Mobile.Com have you ever spotted McDonald's hot crispy fries right as they're being scooped into the carton and time just stands still?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Ba da ba ba ba.

[Tammy Brown]

Ladies and gentlemen, you know her from cross dressing. You know her from Drag Race. You know her from the Browns. You know her from being Kelly Mantle's friend and also our friend. And you know her from her upcoming show in Provincetown. In the Red Room. This summer. Give it up for Tammy Brown. Woo.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Exciting.

[Tammy Brown]

You know, when I listen to other podcasts, we never do intros. We just start talking and then the listeners probably like, who the fuck is this going on?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, the listeners liked me being on here. That's why I said I have to come back and promote my show in Provincetown, the Red Room. It's called Ethereal. I have a new single. Let's make it the song of the summer.

[Trixie Mattel]

Please, let's have an ethereal summer.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You better believe it. It's a feeling.

[Tammy Brown]

I have seen a show in The Red Room. And it's. They got the good air conditioning down there.

[Trixie Mattel]

What's the Red Room look like? What's the pews? They got.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, they don't got pews. That's the post office.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, the post office.

[Tammy Brown]

That's where they don't have the good air conditioning. That's where I was.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I was there, too.

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, yeah. Y. She did it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, not with you, but before you.

[Tammy Brown]

Different set.

[Trixie Mattel]

How many. How many seating in the post office?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Huh?

[Tammy Brown]

How many? 110, maybe. In the post office. Right. And Red Room is a little smaller. Little smaller.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But they have two rooms now. They're going to put people upstairs as well. And Ginger Minj will be there this summer. All right. And you're going to be there?

[Tammy Brown]

Yes, I'm DJing at the Red Room.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, DJing.

[Tammy Brown]

Yes. I'm doing one weekend at the Red Room if you want to come dance and I don't. I'm not doing Dragon on vacation. Don't yell at me.

[Trixie Mattel]

Don't. They're so rude.

[Tammy Brown]

They're so. Well, I don't want people to be mad, but I also don't want to advertise that I'm in drag. If I'm not, then. Then they have a right to be bad. So come see me. Bald and sweating.

[Trixie Mattel]

How would you like. How would you advertise that? DJ Trixie Mattel out of drag. Egghead DJ tricks.

[Tammy Brown]

DJ tricks. Just come. Obviously, all of you have been wanting me out of drag for years because of. They want to.

[Trixie Mattel]

They want to.

[Tammy Brown]

You. They want to.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Me like to do it with your makeup on.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, I think they get intimidated.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sensual rhythms.

[Tammy Brown]

Sensual rhythm.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, baby.

[Tammy Brown]

I love this wig. You've been wearing this, like, blonde mullet, kind of chopping the front with the.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Long piece that's, you know. Vanity wigs by vanity.

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Shake and ghost. Shout out to Vanity.

[Tammy Brown]

Shout out to Vanity. Can I be honest? I have really wholeheartedly embraced the hard front wig revolution. Vanity just sort of said, never mind. We're doing hard fronts again. And I said, okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm sick.

[Trixie Mattel]

It's a wig.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Lace fronts, to be honest with you.

[Tammy Brown]

Very sick of it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm bored with them. Everybody has one from here to Kingdoms Come.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, let's go back to some hard, Hard fringe. Hard plastic fringe.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Shout out to Morgan McMichaels with her hard fronts back in the day. Oh, God, Morgan. We love you, Morgan. Don't worry. Shout out.

[Trixie Mattel]

That'd be a good dance night. Hard front.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hard front. Oh, yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Hard front. Lace Back, hard front.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Give me the maneuvers, baby.

[Tammy Brown]

What do you think you would be doing if you didn't do drag at this moment, that time?

[Trixie Mattel]

That's a good question.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That's. That's something I would be doing.

[Tammy Brown]

You're going on like 25. 25 years of Tammy. About. Yeah. Are you serious? How old are you?

[Ryan Reynolds]

For sure? 25 already?

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, because I went to 20 years of Tammy, which is about five years ago.

[Ryan Reynolds]

44.

[Trixie Mattel]

44.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You went to 20 years of Tammy?

[Tammy Brown]

Wasn't that 20, 21. Was it right after Covet or right before?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, it was. It was. It was 2019, girl.

[Tammy Brown]

That is 26 years of Tammy before.

[Ryan Reynolds]

The big one hit.

[Tammy Brown]

The big one?

[Trixie Mattel]

The big one.

[Tammy Brown]

Gosh.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And I would have probably been living up in San Francisco if coven didn't hit.

[Trixie Mattel]

Really?

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah. It's so expensive. I was there and while I was in Oakland, which I know is different than San Francisco.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But it's expensive everywhere, though, period.

[Tammy Brown]

The cost of living.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But I love San Francisco.

[Trixie Mattel]

You do?

[Ryan Reynolds]

My favorite city.

[Tammy Brown]

It's so pretty. It is.

[Trixie Mattel]

I mean. Yeah. I guess all my memories of the are the human coming out of the.

[Tammy Brown]

Feast, like, oh, the human coming out of the feces and the shooting up, say, east holes.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Them say. Is how they say defecate in Bulgarian. East holes.

[Trixie Mattel]

There you go.

[Tammy Brown]

A lot of Bulgarians in P Town.

[Trixie Mattel]

Workers, right? They love us.

[Tammy Brown]

And they love us. Some of the gentlemen callers, you ever get in the pity cab and cross your legs a lot and say, like, o, you're God. You must work out a lot doing this. I just.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I just give them a massage and smoke weed with them. You know, stuff like that.

[Tammy Brown]

Is weed legal in Massachusetts? Yes, you do. Oh, good. Is there dispensaries in P town now?

[Trixie Mattel]

There's.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, lots of them.

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, thank God.

[Trixie Mattel]

There's. God.

[Tammy Brown]

When I. I've been doing a lot of weed, and now when I go, are you where it's illegal? I'm like. I'm like, what do we do? Yeah, get on. Go to a high school football game and panhandle.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, my God.

[Tammy Brown]

It's just too hard to get marijuana in the states.

[Trixie Mattel]

Is it not legal in.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, tell you where. Pocatello, Idaho. Over there in Idaho.

[Trixie Mattel]

Pocatello, Idaho.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I like it there. Main and vintage. That's where I got this and this.

[Tammy Brown]

I love your little shirt.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Thank you.

[Tammy Brown]

Very cute.

[Trixie Mattel]

Very cute.

[Tammy Brown]

You're 44 years old.

[Ryan Reynolds]

44 before be 45. September 15th.

[Trixie Mattel]

Holy.

[Tammy Brown]

Head of hair.

[Trixie Mattel]

Full head of luscious, gorgeous, real hair.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Getting my grays, like three or four.

[Trixie Mattel]

Grays right now, the only time I'm.

[Tammy Brown]

Going to know I'm gray is going to be in the pubes.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Really?

[Tammy Brown]

I mean, how else would I know? The eyebrows.

[Trixie Mattel]

That's tough.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You think you'll dye them?

[Tammy Brown]

I can, I tell you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, why not?

[Tammy Brown]

I have seen people with. I do think, like, blue armpit hair is, like, kind of cute.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, really?

[Tammy Brown]

Or like a blue beard. I do like eyebrows. I'm just saying I like other parts of the body. Colored hair. So would I hate colored pubes? I don't know.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, no.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Really?

[Trixie Mattel]

I don't think it's a good look.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Would you use the chemical or would you use, like, henna?

[Tammy Brown]

Well, henna cubes. You can use vegetable dye. Yes, but you can't really remove. The only way to remove color would be to bleach your. I don't know if you want to do a lightener on the pubic area.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Why not?

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Like, Nick is blonde. Yeah. So presumably Nick has some blondish pubes. So they'll take color. My pubes are jet black.

[Ryan Reynolds]

This is what I suggest.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, my God.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Because you put some of the peroxides on there and go lay out in the sun.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, like a.

[Tammy Brown]

Like leave like a sun in. I do sun in on my pubes. Lemon juice. Oh, no.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Then. Then you can dye it with, like, Easter egg dye or something. Food coloring like that.

[Tammy Brown]

Like a natural dye.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay, baby.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay, let's direct dye those pubes.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, sometimes I see the little white doggies walking around that have been colored and they use vegetable dye.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Tammy Brown]

Because you know you're not gonna put harmful chemicals on your.

[Trixie Mattel]

On your dog for Easter.

[Ryan Reynolds]

On. Your terror is dingling.

[Tammy Brown]

Right. What's been going on with the gentleman callers? Are you dating? No, I don't date.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I just have a lot of fun. Why? What happened?

[Tammy Brown]

Nothing.

[Trixie Mattel]

No? No.

[Tammy Brown]

Did they tell you about dating Tammy?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I just see people tell you about that. I just see people fly my friends around.

[Trixie Mattel]

Are you single, gal?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm single. To mingle.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

You like being alone?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't mind being alone. I like to cuddle, though. Yeah, that's what I do. I'm. I'm. Guess I'm considered what they would say, a side.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, tell us what that is actually.

[Tammy Brown]

Side sleeper.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Side sleeper.

[Trixie Mattel]

What is that exactly, though? Because it's not a top or a bottom. Right. It's a versatile. Versatile. Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Asexual. Would need to be asexual sideways.

[Tammy Brown]

You don't want to do.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You don't do anal.

[Trixie Mattel]

That's what I thought, too.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sucking and ducking.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, my God.

[Tammy Brown]

Anal's a lot. Anal's a lot.

[Trixie Mattel]

It is a lot. Yeah. Tell me about it. I don't. I haven't done anal in so long.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Do you have the ones where, like, you don't. You can put it in there, nothing comes out.

[Tammy Brown]

You know, I'm. I bottom. I'm a bottom, but I've never related to bottom culture.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Really?

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, my God.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, I feel like if you're a bottom, you're supposed to be basically like a crackhead for up your ass.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, yeah. Like insatiable. All the coffee, all hours.

[Tammy Brown]

You want as many as you can. You want big, you want hard, you want to be, you know, ravaged. And I think that I like to enjoy bottoming the way people would enjoy, you know, a cigar.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. One special event, one at a time.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

Every once in a while.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Cruise control.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah. Like, I don't need it to be. It doesn't need to be violent for me. It doesn't need to be as many as possible.

[Trixie Mattel]

Or a marathon. A marathon, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

My goodness, whatever works. I mean, you could use a carrot if you need to.

[Trixie Mattel]

Or a cucumber.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, yeah, that's for French.

[Trixie Mattel]

Do you speak Spanish?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, I speak Spanish and I'm learning now. Out learning a little bit of French now. W. I think we talked about this last. Last year. And then I am learning Bulgarian as well.

[Trixie Mattel]

Really?

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, my God. You're going to be able to gag them in p. Town St. That means. Oh, I love that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And means heart. Okay, so wi means kiss.

[Tammy Brown]

In Provincetown, a lot of people come from BU to work for the summer.

[Trixie Mattel]

The seasonal work.

[Tammy Brown]

Young 20, 25 year olds just making cash in hand, doing. Doing their thing, partying every night. Bulgarian music. Bumping.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Cha cha is what the music is called.

[Tammy Brown]

Cha cha.

[Trixie Mattel]

I have a Bulgarian masseuse who is so hot. Oh, my God. He could just break me in half. I love that man.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Mine say to me, tummy, I cannot say no to you.

[Tammy Brown]

Tommy, Tommy, Tommy, Tommy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And I learned the Cyrillic Alphabet.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Because they do have the Cyrillic Alphabet like you. Yeah. Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

In fact, I sent a picture of the back of your album. It says something on the. What does it say on the back. Back there? It's in. It's in Russian.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Is Russian the cerule.

[Ryan Reynolds]

What do you have? What. What is the word on the.

[Trixie Mattel]

I don't know what it would. On the back of my.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Your album. One of the songs is titled in Russian.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, glass. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It means eyeball.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Means kitty cat eyes.

[Trixie Mattel]

Kitty cat eyes. Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And then there was one Eyed Ron. And he would take his glass eye and lay it on the counter.

[Tammy Brown]

There was a woman. I was a. I worked at a restaurant, and there was an older woman, and she had a fake eye. And they said that if you graduate, because a lot of people work. There were high schoolers, you know, dishwash, dishwashing dishes, whatever, if you graduated, that she would. She would take it out and show you. I never got to see it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Can you really just pop it out?

[Tammy Brown]

But the owner of the restaurant.

[Trixie Mattel]

Just pop it out.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, you pop it out.

[Trixie Mattel]

Pop it out.

[Tammy Brown]

They take it out at night.

[Ryan Reynolds]

They have to.

[Trixie Mattel]

Are you serious?

[Tammy Brown]

Right? You don't sleep with it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

They don't want your. Swallow it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Damn.

[Tammy Brown]

There's this gentleman I watch on Instagram reels, and he has a collection of. Of different eyes.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, my God.

[Tammy Brown]

And so it'll be like, show me your green one. He has, like, special effects ones, I think. Sparkler. I would be fun to have, like a glitter one, right? Glitter eye.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, glitter eye. The sparkler.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

I mean, obviously I've never lost a limb, but I think if I lost an appendage or a limb, I would. My instinct would be to have wild abandon with the color and textures.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

You know?

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Like a prosthetic.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, like checker rainbow or all different types, you know.

[Ryan Reynolds]

We were going to buy a prosthetic leg once up there in Portland, Oregon, in the thrift shops. And this guy came and swept it up right as soon as he saw us. Competitive thrifters.

[Tammy Brown]

Totally.

[Trixie Mattel]

Damn.

[Tammy Brown]

You know, competitive housing in P Town, I got housing for a week this year. I think it was ten grand.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, you want to hear my situation?

[Tammy Brown]

Ten grand?

[Trixie Mattel]

Are you serious?

[Tammy Brown]

Well, it's a three bedroom. Because I have some friends coming. Ten grand for a week.

[Ryan Reynolds]

My summer is. It's renting. It's $20,000. And then I put the money deposit down everything. It's a little bungalow. And then they turn around and said that our cottage, so to speak. And then they turn around and said there's not gonna be any bed sheets, no linens. I had to bring my own linens.

[Tammy Brown]

Fierce.

[Trixie Mattel]

Damn.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Fucking hell, Provincetown.

[Tammy Brown]

I swear, the housing is so crazy. And you either have to have like a shitty place with a million roommates or just like, paint arm.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And like last year I was in the Moppet house, but we're not there anymore.

[Trixie Mattel]

Damn.

[Tammy Brown]

I say with peaches. Christ and I lived together one summer.

[Trixie Mattel]

What was the one. What was the summer where like somebody almost burned the place down.

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, Raja acts like she doesn't remember this and she might not because I've seen that whore. I've done P town with her as you have. She'd have like two weed cookies and a bottle of wine and then go perform. Fucking go sing Adam Lambert music for real.

[Trixie Mattel]

So crazy.

[Tammy Brown]

And she stayed in my. My first summer there. Diana, our man, our. My former manager, she was like, can Raja stay in your house for a week because you're not going to be there and you're already renting. And I said, sure. And then I get a call that the police were called and the fire department came because Raja got home from the bar. Raja, I've told the story and she knows.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

She was hard boiling eggs and fell. Asle is cool. From the bar and hard boil some eggs.

[Trixie Mattel]

That is so wild.

[Tammy Brown]

I want the wet parts. I want the weird wet beer farts.

[Ryan Reynolds]

The eggs.

[Tammy Brown]

Eggs and wine. Oh, and they just sleep with both legs in the air. They get pickled.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, you know what I'm saying.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

No, for real. They're pressure cooked.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh my God.

[Tammy Brown]

So. But you stayed with me, remember? It had no air conditioning, no WI fi.

[Trixie Mattel]

It was like a rustic. It was crazy. It was like rustic Cabin in the woods kind of vibes. It was wild.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That's one issue I have with Provincetown. Besides round and round and round.

[Trixie Mattel]

So expensive.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's ridiculous.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, it's expensive.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Ridiculous. Are you listening? You don't care.

[Trixie Mattel]

Mayor of Provincetown, please lower your prices.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That's coast attitude.

[Tammy Brown]

It was like eight grand.

[Trixie Mattel]

That is so up.

[Tammy Brown]

And it was no elect. It was no WI fi, no air conditioning. The shower was in the kitchen with the toilet. Like it was.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, yes. That's how it is there.

[Trixie Mattel]

Why is that allowed to happen?

[Ryan Reynolds]

And then the other apartment I rented in 2019 with Ezra. Tualo, shout out to Ezra.

[Tammy Brown]

Hey, wonderful singer.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, he makes you cry tenderly.

[Tammy Brown]

He was an NFL player who sings. And he sings like a. A broken angel from heaven.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And he has a ring to prove it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Damn.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay, but we were sitting in our apartment and electricity went off. And then they also told us a sixteen thousand dollar rent. They said that it wasn't included. Electricity.

[Trixie Mattel]

Electricity was not included in the sixteen thousand dollar rent.

[Ryan Reynolds]

They didn't tell us. We're sitting in there and the lights went out fierce. I thought maybe it was a power outage in town because those things Happen. Being that it's a peninsula.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, my God.

[Tammy Brown]

That's what people don't realize, too, is, like, how many shows as an artist you have to do before you actually even break even with your housing, and then you collect profit. It takes a lot of shows to pay for the summer food.

[Trixie Mattel]

Everybody has to bark, right?

[Tammy Brown]

I like pretty much.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I mean, it's okay. I prefer to bark there than I would in Puerto Vallarta.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, gosh.

[Tammy Brown]

To be honest, in P Town, sometimes I don't know if you feel this way, Tammy. Some days I just was like, I don't want to do the show. Embarking forces you to get on. Get into it. You better get into it, honey.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Get into it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

And other people's energy when they come up to you gets you a little bit in show mode. You're like, all right, I'm pissed. It's hot.

[Trixie Mattel]

But, yeah, I just think about all of another showgirl just screaming, showgirls, Showgirls, Showgirls.

[Ryan Reynolds]

We got shows. We got shows. That's Brian's. Varla Jean Merman's. Ryan, you know him?

[Trixie Mattel]

Wait, Barley Jeans is his assistant.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, her. Her assistant, Ryan. We got. We got shows.

[Trixie Mattel]

Shows.

[Tammy Brown]

We got shows.

[Ryan Reynolds]

He keeps trying to invite me to the nudie beach over there where they're swinging and dinging. I'm not going to do any of that.

[Tammy Brown]

Is that the one on the West End?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I believe so.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah. I've never been there either. And I see the little. I think they were as faggots. Faggots in their, like, tiny, shitty bike. Short, like, they're tiny, shitty nautical outfits. And they all love to do that bandana. Bandana around the neck. You can like me. I'm like a little boy Scout, me.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, my God. Grab the back and hold it.

[Tammy Brown]

Yes.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, shopping bag.

[Tammy Brown]

They're biking with the. The bike seat straight up the collapsed.

[Trixie Mattel]

No seat, no seat, no seat.

[Tammy Brown]

And they're going to go, I guess, get naked.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

You. I know them. I mean, I've never gone.

[Tammy Brown]

There's the dick do. That's what.

[Trixie Mattel]

Love the dick dog.

[Tammy Brown]

But the beach is naked daytime, and the girls bike out there and let their little peanuts hang. And it's the whole beach. Like, how's the whole beach stuff? The beach of holes.

[Trixie Mattel]

How big of a sec. How big of a section is it?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I haven't been there myself. I just keep getting invited, but I'm just not into that.

[Tammy Brown]

They call it boy beach, right?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, something like that.

[Trixie Mattel]

Do we do public nudity?

[Tammy Brown]

I don't do that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, you can do it in San Francisco. All about town.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, that is true. And people surely do do that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You're sure they're. They're buying. Buying an ice cream cone completely butt.

[Trixie Mattel]

Naked except for shoes.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But I'm a cookie.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, Soft serve.

[Tammy Brown]

The nude people are funny to me, but I love when they're going places and they're like, here's my butt towel. And they put their butt towel down so they can, like, sit.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, I would hope so.

[Tammy Brown]

It's very not me. I can spread the cheeks and seal myself.

[Trixie Mattel]

Seal myself white furniture, no problem.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That happens, though.

[Tammy Brown]

Today's episode of Bald and Beautiful is sponsored by Airbnb. I just booked my Airbnb for Provincetown for this summer because I'm performing and so I not only had to worry about my accommodations, but of course, all my little, you know, leech friends who want me to pay for everything, but apparently want me to book everything. So luckily Airbnb made that easier for me. I'm traveling with friends. I know we want to eat together. I know we want, like a local feel. And, you know, I've stayed in Provincetown a lot, so luckily for me, I know the neighborhoods pretty well. And so that makes me even more critical when booking because I'm like, is this centrally located? I know how this town is laid out. And the truth is they are what they say they are. I stayed in an Airbnb property last year in Promised Town as well, because I DJed at the the Red Room and it was perfect for me. I was going there with my two friends and my friend Jake and my friend Ian got us a little three bedrooms who each had a little bedrooms, and it was perfect. I knew I wanted to stay really close to the theaters, so I stayed right behind an old theater I used to work at, actually. And it was perfect. It was. Than in the pictures. So if you're planning a trip or just going back to visit your hometown like me this year, consider hosting your home on Airbnb while you're away. It's the perfect way to earn a little extra cash to put towards your next vacation fund or that treat yourself splurge purchase you've been eyeing. Your home might be worth a lot more than you think. Find out how [e-mail] host this episode.

[Trixie Mattel]

Of the Bald and the Beautiful is sponsored by BetterHelp. Workplace stress is the new pandemic, listeners. 61% of the global workforce is hanging on by a thread, and that thread is made of dental floss. But we can't all quit our jobs and start restoring vintage cars and beekeeping in the Mojave Desert. So this summer, let's take tiny steps toward wellness. Me, I used to sit in the sun until I hallucinated. A very wise crow with a rainbow crown would eventually give me some sage advice. But fictitious crows are not a viable solution in 2025. That's where BetterHelp comes in. It's not just for trauma. It's for anyone who wants to cope better. Set boundaries or stop crying in the Trader Joe's parking lot because your new black toilet brings you so much joy. Therapy is like a really good pumice stone. It's like exfoliating your soul's armpits. So even if you start somewhere weird, you can end somewhere wonderful. But the bottom line, just start. Listen, people better help helped me, and they can help you too. All from the comfort of your couch, your car, or even the job that you loathe with the power of a thousand suns. It's easy to sign up and tailored to you. With over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform, having served over 5 million people globally. And it works with an App store rating of 4.9 out of 5 based on over 1.7 million client reviews. You can join a session with a therapist at the click of a button, helping you fit therapy into your busy life, plus switch therapists at any time. As the largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of expertise. Unwind from work. With BetterHelp, our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com bald. That's BetterHelp. H-E-L-P.com bald.

[Tammy Brown]

What's the rose and the thorn of the P Town experience for you? Because you've done so many summers of this and you've become kind of a must see item in the town.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, I haven't gotten the COVID of the little local magazine yet.

[Tammy Brown]

Okay, Provostown magazine.

[Trixie Mattel]

Get on it.

[Tammy Brown]

Get Tammy on the magazine, please.

[Trixie Mattel]

We want to have a nude centerfold.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, swell.

[Trixie Mattel]

Right? With a. With a.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Can you imagine?

[Trixie Mattel]

With the. Yeah, in the.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Can you imagine?

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes, I can.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Are you looking right now?

[Trixie Mattel]

Very. Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, you're so beautiful.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, you're in wonderful shape. I just gave Tammy. I mean, you always are in shape. Maybe you need to do porn. Did you ever do the out of drag sexy spread?

[Ryan Reynolds]

You know, I do that stuff sometimes.

[Tammy Brown]

You do?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I've already done that.

[Trixie Mattel]

Get out of here.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Play girl by little. Oh, play girl. Remember that?

[Trixie Mattel]

I sure do.

[Ryan Reynolds]

God, all I think of is Hugh Hefner making those girls suck the dogs off. Bestiality in the documentary about how horrible it was up there in the mansion, and they have that little pool, and they're floating around in there.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, it's true.

[Ryan Reynolds]

He was having the girl suck the dogs off.

[Trixie Mattel]

No, no, no.

[Tammy Brown]

Tammy, the big dog.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, my God.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Could you imagine? What is that?

[Tammy Brown]

You know what? Some of those weird rich old men. So maybe I take the dog. Creepy old rich men. Maybe I'll just do the dog.

[Trixie Mattel]

Just do the dog. But we're gonna play girls with the guys.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, I know. I'm just being silly.

[Tammy Brown]

I guess what I. What I like about the P Town Experience is you don't have to. You get to do a show overnight without traveling.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, sure.

[Tammy Brown]

And you get to leave your stuff at the theater so there's no suitcases.

[Trixie Mattel]

It's like a residency, essentially.

[Tammy Brown]

How long do you take to get ready?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, it takes too long. I was supposed to be ready today, but I counseled one of my friends from Bulgaria on the phone. He was in his mood, and I said, well, let me help you out, sir.

[Trixie Mattel]

How did you help?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Maybe takes three. I just talked to him.

[Trixie Mattel]

Three hours.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I take about that because I shave head to toe.

[Trixie Mattel]

What? Are you kidding?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I shave head to toe.

[Trixie Mattel]

So you really get.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You. I take the whole body into it. Are you joking?

[Trixie Mattel]

Are you serious right now?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I mean, two. Let's say two hours. But I would like a three hour.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, should I be honest? When you have three hours, you are in a totally different mindset. You can relax, take a break, have a snack. Sometimes if I get sick of the makeup, I just want to walk around for a second. Yeah, because you are doing this for hours. I don't know. But you guys, I'm not sitting at makeup with perfect posture. I'm, like, hunched and crunched. I stand up and you're like, Yes.

[Trixie Mattel]

I prefer to stand because it goes quicker and it's less. Like, I don't know. I don't know when I started sitting down, I guess maybe when we started doing theaters, like. But I felt like standing is better.

[Ryan Reynolds]

When I do all of my work, too. I stand anyways in this. When I'm working on the dolls, the Rag Queens, or when I'm working on the embroidered pieces, I stand. It's either the blood flows better.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

Or like a. On a treadmill.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, on a treadmill.

[Trixie Mattel]

Backwards walking desk.

[Tammy Brown]

That explains a lot.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. Walking desk.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You do that?

[Trixie Mattel]

No, but I'm a pacer. I love to pay. I love to walk. I get my steps in.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Pacing.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay. I do, too.

[Trixie Mattel]

Upstairs, downstairs, I love stairs.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sometimes I carry my suitcases.

[Tammy Brown]

You love stairs?

[Trixie Mattel]

I love stairs.

[Tammy Brown]

Why?

[Trixie Mattel]

Because it's like you're going up, you're going down.

[Tammy Brown]

No, no. Okay, okay. Love it.

[Trixie Mattel]

No, because it's like exercise, but it's just integrated into your life, I swear, you know.

[Tammy Brown]

Can I say, you know what? The Sky Club, how they always have the elevator in the stairs. I always take the stairs.

[Trixie Mattel]

Well, yeah, Elevators is. I don't know.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You're afraid to get locked in there?

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes. And also, like, I don't understand how some hotels or many buildings, in fact, don't offer a stairway option. Like, if it's like four floors.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hold it, though. For our friends in England, it's a lift.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes, yes, yes, yes. But, like, why.

[Tammy Brown]

Why do I.

[Trixie Mattel]

Why am I struggling to find the stairway and why isn't that an option?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, what about parking structures? It's impossible to find a stairway, and they want you to walk up the ramp.

[Trixie Mattel]

Thank you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Give me a break.

[Trixie Mattel]

What if a fire breaks out in the elevator? What are we supposed to do?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, hang in there.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, my God. Did we ever tell you what happened to your colleague Kelly Mantle in Sydney, Australia?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I believe it. What?

[Tammy Brown]

She wanted to walk to the theater. She does half her makeup at home, so she does just her brows and foundation, and then she'll walk to the venue and do the rest. And she wanted to walk. She put the directions and maps, but she put. As if she was a car and not on foot. So she walks up the ramp of the freeway, suitcase and just half makeup, calling the tour director, being like, can you guys come get me?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Was she laughing? I'm sure she was.

[Tammy Brown]

She's always laughing, I guess, but, like, kind of a lot. Lizard like her, I think she was like, well, if I make a few extra bucks, it is what it is.

[Ryan Reynolds]

She's not that sensual.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, she's married now.

[Ryan Reynolds]

She's been married.

[Tammy Brown]

Been married.

[Ryan Reynolds]

She has a beautiful relationship.

[Tammy Brown]

He is so sweet.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Kelly.

[Tammy Brown]

Shout out to Kelly Mantles.

[Trixie Mattel]

Pour one out for Kelly James.

[Tammy Brown]

Poor.

[Trixie Mattel]

One out for Kelly. Yeah, she's fabulous.

[Tammy Brown]

When did you figure out that you and Kelly had such a good. Like. Because you guys really are magical together.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, it was like, you two, you know, how.

[Trixie Mattel]

When did. When was the rapport established?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, we did that a long time ago, probably. We officially met in 2008. And we did that show Queens Collide. And then we were. We would do other little local shows around town. Jerry Bird Jones and these other things. And at the Casilla de Campo and then in Silver Lake. And then we had each other's numbers and we'd always hit it off. And then finally I just called her up and said, okay, because we're always playing around and we're like, well, let's do a band. We will always say this, so let's do something. So finally I said, all right. I called her up. That's. I'm like that persistent with people and we connected. And since then it's always been a really nice connection.

[Trixie Mattel]

It's a long time.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. 2008.

[Tammy Brown]

Did you used to go to that place that she told us about, the some 2555 peanuts or whatever it's called?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh yeah. I used to work there for Mario Diaz though, but it was a different night. Hot dog. It's called 7969.

[Tammy Brown]

7969 peanuts.

[Trixie Mattel]

What is the Peanuts?

[Tammy Brown]

Remember that's the bar Kelly was telling us about.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Transsexuals.

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, with like the girls. Girls. To meet the gentleman calling.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, the tea girls.

[Trixie Mattel]

Damn. Where are those?

[Tammy Brown]

You worked there?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, I used to work for Mario Diaz and actually Raja got me Raja. She got me the job. Oh. No tea, no shade.

[Tammy Brown]

Local egg cook.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, notable.

[Tammy Brown]

Notable egg boiler.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I salutin'. That's sharp, isn't it?

[Trixie Mattel]

Notable egg.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I used to dance for him and there was a pole and I would dance on the pole.

[Trixie Mattel]

Pussy pole.

[Tammy Brown]

Uh huh.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And then I would work Big fat Dick, the other one at the Foo Bar.

[Tammy Brown]

You know, I missed that party.

[Trixie Mattel]

It's so funny. You say that again.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Big fat Dick.

[Trixie Mattel]

Love it.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, some parties it's like a suggestive name. Like. Yes, like, like swell. Yeah, yeah, like you know, Turgid.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know what they call turgid.

[Tammy Brown]

I don't know. Yeah, swollen. This one was just called Big Fat.

[Trixie Mattel]

Big Fat Toads Hop.

[Tammy Brown]

Even Hot dog is like suggested. This is just called.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Are you guys going to come down to Big Wet Pussy?

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, no more innuendos, just straight back.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Straightforward.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Did you ever do the dick picture?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, please. But one of those dick big guys ripped my wig off once.

[Tammy Brown]

What?

[Trixie Mattel]

We would take picture. Picture.

[Ryan Reynolds]

So they go back in the back and they take the pictures of the dinglings and they put them all up there. They're tally whackers. And you don't know.

[Trixie Mattel]

I don't know. About this.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And they rate the number one biggest dingling out there.

[Trixie Mattel]

Well, wouldn't it be.

[Tammy Brown]

So Mario's little used to be the hot in the DJ booth with like, you know, a spotlight that they used to like find deer at night.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Uhhuh.

[Tammy Brown]

Like a deer spotting light. And like ladies and gentlemen, contestant number two. And they. Cuz they would take you in the back room, photograph your hard dick. Put a picture, a glossy 8x12 of it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, on the right too.

[Tammy Brown]

No, on a clothes. Clothes pin.

[Trixie Mattel]

Wow. And then you just. What do you win?

[Tammy Brown]

A handle of booze?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Something like that.

[Trixie Mattel]

But isn't it like. Isn't it like you did not.

[Tammy Brown]

I got so drunk and entered. I left before. I left before it went up there.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh my God.

[Tammy Brown]

Diana was like, trixie, you cannot do that. And I'm like.

[Ryan Reynolds]

She'S probably encouraging you.

[Trixie Mattel]

That's.

[Tammy Brown]

No, she was like, trixie, you can't do that. I was like, should we go?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Did she go with you or did she stay there?

[Tammy Brown]

We left. Also, I don't have tattoos or anything, so like how would you know it was me? I guess so, cuz my hands were like.

[Trixie Mattel]

Cuz you're. Your face is in it too.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Like this.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah. Well, you. Some people take it hard, I guess. I don't know. I. I only went a few times, but it was fun. And they have the go gos, the gorgeous. They always have. Mario always has the best, hottest go gos.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I like that. Johnny, you ever hooked up with a Go Go dancer? No, just hang out with them sometimes.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Draw their ding a links trace of, you know, at Club Cobra. Now they have so good. Some hot dancers at Club Cobra.

[Trixie Mattel]

When I was Cobra.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's out there in the Valley.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That's where I'm doing a show this Friday. But this podcast will already have Cobra.

[Tammy Brown]

Cobra.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Club Cobra. It's a Latin bar.

[Tammy Brown]

I'm looking for new gay bars. Honestly, club cover.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's. It's out there in the Valley. North Hollywood.

[Tammy Brown]

North Hollywood I want to go to. Is it Bolt?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Huh?

[Tammy Brown]

Is that where Fina goes?

[Trixie Mattel]

I have no idea.

[Tammy Brown]

Bolt.

[Trixie Mattel]

Bolt. Bullet. Bullet. Bullet.

[Tammy Brown]

Bullet. Bolt is that movie, that Pixar movie. Okay. Bullet is that gay bar that Fina goes to. I'm looking for more like Eagle vibes.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, a little trashier. More like a neighborhood watering hole.

[Tammy Brown]

Not like a sexy West Hollywood drink. More like dirty men with Bo taking shots.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay, well, I don't know too many of those right now.

[Tammy Brown]

Okay. That's okay.

[Trixie Mattel]

Would you ever go on all Stars again?

[Ryan Reynolds]

You know, I would like to be. You know, I was rated.

[Trixie Mattel]

You were what?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Entertainment Weekly rated me. There's 25 of the best reality stars, and I was number 20.

[Trixie Mattel]

You get out of here.

[Ryan Reynolds]

So maybe celebrity Big Brother.

[Tammy Brown]

Okay, Traders, trade.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay. Do it. Do it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm serious.

[Trixie Mattel]

Do it.

[Tammy Brown]

I do it. Would love you on a show like that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, let's get me on there. Y' all got some mojo. Give me something.

[Trixie Mattel]

Get her on Traders. For Christ's sake, people.

[Tammy Brown]

Big Brother looks hard.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Really? I'll just sit in the house.

[Trixie Mattel]

What do you do on Big Brother? Just. You do challenges and, like, what.

[Tammy Brown]

It's a lot of doing nothing, which would be hard.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Really?

[Tammy Brown]

Can't watch tv and then you don't.

[Trixie Mattel]

Want to surveill the whole time, assuming.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But I can cook.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And I'll meditate.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay. And you win a million dollars at the end. I guess you win a million dollars minus taxes.

[Tammy Brown]

I love you on Big Brother.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, let's get me on there. Tell your fans to write them letters.

[Trixie Mattel]

Get her on Big Brother.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You know, All Stars again. I. I don't think I'll ever be asked back to be on that show. Of course. And I find so vocal.

[Trixie Mattel]

Vocal and combative.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't. Wouldn't say I'm combative. I just speak the truth, as one does.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I just don't. I find it actually rather frustrating because I hear that they're bringing other people back and stuff, like, oh, okay. They're really a fan favorite, aren't they? You know what I mean? Well, I mean, the truth is the truth.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And then there's also, like, who has the. All the catchphrases? It's me.

[Trixie Mattel]

Hello. That's true. That's true.

[Tammy Brown]

Wait a minute. Did you see. Oh, my God. I just saw this news anchor who said that he was going to work in as many Drag Race catchphrases until, like, he did into, like, a weather thing. Did you see this?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes.

[Tammy Brown]

And he goes. And Teletubbies teleport us to Mars because it's going to be sunny today. For real.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, he did.

[Trixie Mattel]

On what? It was like a.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Live from Kingston, Virginia.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, damn, that's fierce.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know. Where was it at?

[Trixie Mattel]

I don't. I've never heard of it.

[Tammy Brown]

You do have an endurance. The things you say and do in television endure.

[Ryan Reynolds]

There's more to come.

[Tammy Brown]

They live in my mind and many of the fans of yours minds forever.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You like that? Change that costume. Change it around.

[Trixie Mattel]

Change it around. That's one of my favorite lines.

[Tammy Brown]

Acting.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Acting.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. I love that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

See, we got it together.

[Tammy Brown]

The dead body.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, God, the dead body.

[Tammy Brown]

The devil. And also my favorite. No, my other favorite is you on the way to dragcon. Do you remember this? Have you seen this?

[Trixie Mattel]

I haven't seen.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, when I pothole.

[Trixie Mattel]

What?

[Tammy Brown]

I don't.

[Ryan Reynolds]

We recorded that twice. It was first recorded the first way. And then. Okay, let's just do it again. And then. Then it ended up kismet that the pothole was there.

[Tammy Brown]

And I said, it's. It's like, it's early. Dragcon is early. You have to go in early. Yeah, it's early. Tammy's not thrilled about being in drag early. And she's in the car and she goes like. Like, well, we're on the way to dragcon. It's early as hell. Whatever. And they hit a pothole and she goes, another pothole. Wish I'd fall in it. Which that is what you feel in day drag on the way to something. You're like, I will just. I want to kill dragon is.

[Trixie Mattel]

No, that's not it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But it's not. It's dead, isn't it? I mean, is it. That ship is sailed.

[Tammy Brown]

I don't think they're doing it this year.

[Ryan Reynolds]

They are not doing it. Why shout out to Marina, though. I do like her.

[Trixie Mattel]

Why are they not doing it?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Who knows financially what it is? How about you? Would you do another All Stars?

[Trixie Mattel]

No. Hell, no. No, no, no, no. Too much money. Too much stress. It's too much money. It's too hard.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah. We don't have. I don't have good drag like that. No.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes to all. No, no.

[Tammy Brown]

Everybody, please. The girls today are doing Transformers, sponsored by Universal Studios.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, really?

[Tammy Brown]

Jurassic World by way of.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

So they get crazy sponsored. The little dresses.

[Tammy Brown]

They just are doing that I don't even aspire to do.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I know.

[Trixie Mattel]

And spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on it. It's wild.

[Tammy Brown]

It's a wig reveal. Once you take the wig off, another person comes out of the wig and then.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, and then.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, then they light the fireworks and, you know, it's. It's too much.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, it's way too much.

[Ryan Reynolds]

What's that got to do with it? Right?

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, I think that's a big part of it. What? I think the. This. The visual presentation has evolved into something that I don't think should include me. Right?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes. Yeah. Also, I don't want to be. I don't want to be like, oh, judge at that level. I could never. I Could never do. I could never. I could never.

[Tammy Brown]

But I would become like, now that I'm older, I think I would become mouthy. When I was younger, I'd be like, oh, you don't like my outfit? I'm sorry. I'm gonna cry about it for two days.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

I'd be like, now at this point, I think I would be like Kennedy Davenport or like, yeah, yeah. Like old crotchety, like, shut your no drag knowledge mouth. You know what I mean?

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, totally.

[Tammy Brown]

Because I think the confidence that I didn't understand when I was younger is like a critique. Is like, yeah, you gave it to me, but I don't really have to listen to you, you know?

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

When I was younger, I was like, okay, you don't like the shoes? I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Internalizing.

[Tammy Brown]

I would take it very personally. And I think now I would be like, I don't care. I liked it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And that's what makes you uniquely you.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah. I don't know. I. I just have such. Do you have positive. I have such a, like, not negative, but arduous memories.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Long days.

[Trixie Mattel]

It's not fun. It's not fun. It's like, it's not fun. That's the thing about it. Like, I can't ever remember it being fun.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's not fun. It's also hard.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, Hard.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Awful. I've been there.

[Tammy Brown]

And other drag queens personalities. I think we all probably relate. I just, sometimes they're on my last nerve immediately.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. And I also, like, I don't want to have to like, oh, sing and dance and all that. It's too much.

[Tammy Brown]

We're in the sit down and talk out of drag era of our drag career.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay.

[Tammy Brown]

You know.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. This episode is sponsored by RO. Ever feel like getting a prescription for Ozempic or WeGovy? Is a full time job. Between phone trees, hold music and paperwork, who has the energy? Especially when the goal is better health. That's why there's RO. RO's free insurance checker slices through the red tape. Snap a pic of your insurance card, hit submit and relax. Within days, you'll get a clear, easy to read report showing whether Your plan covers GLP1 medications. No paperwork, no negotiating, no elevator music.

[Tammy Brown]

Purgatory.

[Trixie Mattel]

I hate waiting forever at an office or not knowing if something is covered by insurance. With ro, they take the stress out of the equation. And if GLP1s fit your health goals, think steady, clinically proven weight loss, improved blood sugar control, even cardiovascular benefits. RO keeps the momentum going. Plus your dedicated provider is just a message way to answer any question you may have. Everyone deserves a healthcare experience that's fast, transparent and on your side. RO makes it simple to take control of your goals, not get buried under insurance confusion because your time and your health are too important to waste. More than 350,000 people have already used RO to check their coverage for free, so ditch the first phone maze and focus on you. Visit Ro Co Bald today to see if you're covered and take the first step toward a healthier lighter you without the hassle. Go to ro co bald for your free insurance check. That's ro company to see if your insurance covers glp1s for free. Go to ro co safety for black box warning and full safety information about GLP1 medications.

[Ryan Reynolds]

When you hear Lululemon, you probably think of Align yoga pants. Weightlessly soft like you're wearing next to nothing. That's why you see them in class, at the grocery store and in the park. But did you know about skirts with built in liner shorts so you can still jump for the Frisbee and tanks and bodysuits with Align's iconic stretch you won't want to take it off.

[Trixie Mattel]

And with endless style options, you you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Don'T have to shop in store or [e-mail] with a Venmo debit card.

[Trixie Mattel]

You can Venmo more than just your friends.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You can use your balance in so many ways. You can Venmo everything.

[Trixie Mattel]

Need gas? You can Venmo this. How about snacks? You can Venmo that. Your favorite band's merch?

[Ryan Reynolds]

You can Venmo this or their next show.

[Trixie Mattel]

You can Venmo that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Visit Venmo Me Debit to learn more.

[Tammy Brown]

You can Venmo this or you can Venmo that. You can Venmo this or you can Venmo that. The Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp bank and a pursuant to license by MasterCard International Incorporated.

[Trixie Mattel]

Card may be used everywhere.

[Tammy Brown]

MasterCard is accepted.

[Trixie Mattel]

Venmo purchase restrictions apply.

[Tammy Brown]

Shop 4th of July Savings at the Home Depot right now and get up to 40% off plus up to an extra $600 off select appliances with free delivery like Samsung.

[Trixie Mattel]

From all in one washer dryers to smart refrigerators.

[Tammy Brown]

Upgrade to tech you can trust with Samsung appliances.

[Trixie Mattel]

The Home Depot has what you need to simplify your routine.

[Tammy Brown]

Don't miss 4th of July appliance savings.

[Trixie Mattel]

At the Home Depot.

[Tammy Brown]

Free delivery on appliance purchases of $396 or more. Offer valid June 18 through July 9, US only. See store or online for details. I think you should tell people what you just said.

[Trixie Mattel]

I think I might have a urinary tract infection.

[Tammy Brown]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

They say cranberry juice indigenous.

[Trixie Mattel]

I thought that was a wives tale, but I guess I'll try it.

[Tammy Brown]

I've never had one.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, it's like. It's like. You know when you're like on the airport, I mean, in the airplane forever, you're like, you had to pee so bad and you go to the urinal and it. It's like, even though you have to pee, like really, really bad it takes to come out. Yeah, that's what it's feel like for the last two days. Oh, like I have. It feels like even now I just peed, but it feels like I have a full bladder still.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yikes.

[Tammy Brown]

I'm. That sucks.

[Trixie Mattel]

It's kind of gross.

[Tammy Brown]

I wonder if you have gonorrhea or.

[Ryan Reynolds]

If you've been masturbating with a soap bar or that.

[Trixie Mattel]

Well, I stick the soap bar up my ass.

[Tammy Brown]

Have you ever gone.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Look at you, so clean.

[Trixie Mattel]

I have. No. I hope I do. I feel like that would be more treatable than a uti.

[Tammy Brown]

My first symptom of gonorrhea, when I had. It was like feeling of having to pee all the time.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Really?

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, no, no, no. I had a gonorrhea scare and they gave me like pre emptive prenatal care. Yes. No, that's when I shit my pants.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, yeah, it's better to retain your fluids.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Have you. On a plane.

[Trixie Mattel]

Have you ever shit your pants before?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, but I was recently with a friend of mine and they did right there in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. And I told the Uber driver in Spanish and then the Uber driver stopped and kicked the car. So the next Uber driver we got into, I didn't tell him.

[Trixie Mattel]

Damn.

[Tammy Brown]

And so you just rode with the.

[Ryan Reynolds]

In the pants and it was his white pants?

[Tammy Brown]

No.

[Trixie Mattel]

Why is it always white pants?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Don't ask me.

[Trixie Mattel]

When you yourself shout out to my.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Friends, Rob and Danny from P Town.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah. Pouring over Tabby Brown and Robbie Brown.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Robbie.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, Robbie Brown.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I love Rob.

[Tammy Brown]

Dude, you have a wonderful experience working in Mexico.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I do, but I'm. I'm gonna take a little bit of a break because they keep playing these little games with me.

[Trixie Mattel]

What kind of games?

[Ryan Reynolds]

And cheesy. Not paying in certain venues. And the other venue has me booked. They didn't put out the proper promotion, the proper advertisement, and as an artist. It's like, okay, this is my labor of love as well. And then you have to go through.

[Tammy Brown]

All this crap that's like, honestly, if we don't sell, because we were fortunate enough to sell really well, pretty much everywhere. If somewhere doesn't sell well. I know. I never think it's our fault, Right. Because I'm like, if this is the first time in a year we don't have great sales, I don't think it's us.

[Trixie Mattel]

No.

[Tammy Brown]

You'll need to get some more posters out there. Get the staples. Get the Kinko shit.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes.

[Tammy Brown]

Wheat paste. Get a town crier.

[Trixie Mattel]

Thank you. Showgirl. Showgirl.

[Tammy Brown]

Showgirls.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But it's just the way the. I mean, you're gonna have that anyways with those kind of shows that sometimes that you're not gonna sell out, but most people are struggling, period, to sell something.

[Trixie Mattel]

Connecticut never was my. Connecticut and Miami.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, Connecticut.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, Miami.

[Trixie Mattel]

Hartford and Miami. Tough crowds, tough markets.

[Tammy Brown]

Okay. We were just playing in Connecticut.

[Trixie Mattel]

We were in Connecticut.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah. And somebody on the tour told me, oh, this is where Katya had the worst show of her life.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes. It was like, yes, it was. Oh, my God. It was. It was. But it was so bad that it was actually good. You know what I mean? Yes.

[Tammy Brown]

Was it the audience? Was it you? Was it vibe?

[Trixie Mattel]

It was both of us. We were both. None of us brought anything to the table. But it was after, like, the Boston show, which was the best show of the tour. And then, like, so we were, like, schlepped to fucking Hartford or whatever. And it's like half sold or less. Like, maybe 40% of the tickets sold. And I'm like, okay, well, they're gonna get a 40% show. And we were all miserable, and I think we all hated it. And then we all just, like. It just agreed that it was like, they'll never do this again.

[Ryan Reynolds]

My issue that Mexico, though, is that we're performing for the Canadians. We're performing for the. The, you know, gringos, and the whole show's in English. Or that we're not doing anything for the people. Which I do have discounted tickets for Paisanos or countrymen or whoever's Latino American can come and get a half off ticket because their value, monetary value is different. Right? Okay, so we work on that. But I'm. I am working with. I want to get into Mexico City. That's where I want to perform in Mexico City.

[Tammy Brown]

We've worked there.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I know. I know.

[Trixie Mattel]

I would move there tomorrow.

[Tammy Brown]

That was one of the only Cities where they had bootleg merch. They were selling Trixie and content bootleg merch. Beyonce. Are you fucking kidding me? That I don't remember that.

[Trixie Mattel]

That's how you know you've made it, remember?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Instead of.

[Tammy Brown]

Instead of being mad about it, like, we were kind of excited and somebody went and bought a bunch of it for us. Oh, really? Was it any.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Did you keep it?

[Trixie Mattel]

Was it any good?

[Tammy Brown]

It was just black. It was copies of our merch. They make copies of the real merch.

[Trixie Mattel]

Love that.

[Tammy Brown]

For cheaper. That's what. I had a bayonce. Remember?

[Trixie Mattel]

Mary, have you seen Beyonce?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Beyonce? This ain't Texas.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, we just saw Beyonce last week and we both transformed.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

Tamatha, explain. Listen to me. Please listen to me. Listen to me with both your ears.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm listening.

[Trixie Mattel]

I don't even listen to Beyonce. I don't even like her that much. That was the best concert I've ever seen in my life. That was the best performer on planet Earth.

[Tammy Brown]

It was incredible.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Was the best.

[Trixie Mattel]

Is. She is the most. I swear. I know it sounds crazy, but it's like she is.

[Tammy Brown]

No, Katya. Text me the next day. I know what you said about the show making you proud to be American.

[Trixie Mattel]

I truly, truly, though, like, I've never been patriotic.

[Tammy Brown]

It made me believe in the human race. It made me believe in the possibility of America and women and. And the future and the promise of America.

[Trixie Mattel]

Especially, like. I mean, especially since I. Not to be corny, but, like, all this stuff that's going on in this country that's a little suspicious. It was like. And. And there's a part in the concert where, like, she has clips of, like, I guess Fox News anchors who are blurred out kind of like poo pooing her, like, foray into country music.

[Tammy Brown]

Like Beyonce allegedly doing country.

[Trixie Mattel]

That black bitch. I mean, that was essentially the. The attitude, stay in your own lane. Yeah. Which is what exactly, you Houston, Texas native?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. You know, country music comes from black people.

[Tammy Brown]

Hello.

[Ryan Reynolds]

So does rock and roll. The goddad God daddy of rock and roll is Ike Turner.

[Trixie Mattel]

Thank you.

[Tammy Brown]

How much of country music is folk music? Who are you to define who those folks are?

[Trixie Mattel]

Also, white people can do any kind of music they want. Nobody ever talks about it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I know.

[Tammy Brown]

Eminem.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Anyway, thank you.

[Trixie Mattel]

It was. She was. Okay, so she's 44. She's 1981. The woman has no pores, no wrinkles.

[Tammy Brown]

She looks 18.

[Trixie Mattel]

She looks. And she has a full expressive register. Her face. Black don't crack, apparently.

[Tammy Brown]

She was. She was the Most beautiful looking thing I've ever seen. The hair, the body, the huge breast, the tiny waist, the. The. The hips. The best singing I've ever heard in my entire life.

[Ryan Reynolds]

This.

[Trixie Mattel]

The live singing, dancing, unreal. The interstitials between costume changes that were Oscar worthy.

[Tammy Brown]

And Tammy, she almost didn't speak at all. Yeah, she barely spoke. Yeah, she would say, like, over here. Yep, y' all look good.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

And then she'd walk over here and say, over here. Y' all look good. And then she would sing for 40 more minutes.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. Three hour show. Three hours.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Three hours.

[Trixie Mattel]

It was so kind. It was so kind.

[Tammy Brown]

I've never done a cabaret style show in. In. In Puerto Vallarta. How does it feel different than Provincetown because they're both kind of these vacation.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Towns.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And. And Vallarta's gentrifying so much, which is a major issue like, like gonna be.

[Trixie Mattel]

Like P Town soon.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's very expensive. It's P Town prices. I took. Took my friends Rob and Danny to lunch and the ones who.

[Tammy Brown]

Their pants.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Trixie Mattel]

Pulling over.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I have a laugh about that.

[Tammy Brown]

What kind of lunch was at Taco Bell?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, it was a dinner. Oh, one of those.

[Tammy Brown]

It was a dinner restaurant. I took him out to lunch.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Excuse me. Excuse me. I thought you were asking about. No, I took them to lunch at one of those tourist trap places there. And it was a hundred bucks.

[Tammy Brown]

Damn.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And in Mexico, lunch for four should probably be like 20 bucks. In reality, that's true.

[Trixie Mattel]

When I was in Tijuana.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Aha, Tijuana.

[Trixie Mattel]

Four of us ate a lovely dinner for 25. I know where can cash.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Caesar salad came from Tijuana, Mexico. All right, notable.

[Tammy Brown]

I've never been to Tijuana, but I know you can. Like, it's driving distance from la, right?

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, baby. You drive, you cruise right over the border with like, just like, free as a bird when you're coming back, mama.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, that's the way to fly.

[Tammy Brown]

That's where. That's where the male comedians go to do drugs and get prostitutes. Right.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, they have the donkey show.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. Need I say more?

[Tammy Brown]

What is it?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's where they get boinked by a donkey. A woman. You better believe it. They bring out dogs and do it all. I've never seen it, but I've only heard, like, in Matamoros, Mexico, where they found that white boy's head in the cauldron down there too. Matamorous. And Matamorous means more killer. And they have a more killer statue in the Catholic church. So how about that? Follow the law of the land, it says in the Bible. But Catholics and most people don't do that. No, I'm getting a little political. We got to be very careful.

[Tammy Brown]

I'm happy you're here because I. I have a hard time balancing not being angry about the world, and we have to be careful. I know we're supposed to be funny and light.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, right. Yes, of course.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, Tam and I were talking about. We're both very vocal and mad. But it's like, I also don't want my YouTube channel demonetized or my, you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Know, this fear going on is really not.

[Trixie Mattel]

I see what you're saying.

[Tammy Brown]

But also, I don't want to be one of these no spine politicians just laying down and letting Daddy Trump just have whatever they want. That's also not me, but you just.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Being you and us being ourselves encourages all those other people to get out there and pick it.

[Tammy Brown]

But it's how. It's also like, oh, well, this is. If Kathy Griffin was on the no Fly List six years ago. What happens to us now?

[Ryan Reynolds]

That's what I'm talking about. Come through security with my little makeup and stuff. Oh, God, now you're going down to Guantanamo Bay.

[Trixie Mattel]

Have you ever gone through security, cock caged?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, but y' all did and. Right. Yeah. What's cage like with a. On your dick? I mean.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, did you do that on your dick?

[Tammy Brown]

Excuse me.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Playing swords.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, she's. She's the infamous immigration queen.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, we know that.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, top.

[Tammy Brown]

What is it?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's top notch. Let's get it straight.

[Trixie Mattel]

Jesus Christ. Sorry.

[Tammy Brown]

But. But we. I used to be like, oh, I'm a comedian. I'm a whatever.

[Trixie Mattel]

I know.

[Tammy Brown]

And now we just say, yeah, I.

[Trixie Mattel]

Dress up like a woman and I act a fool.

[Tammy Brown]

I'm going to put on these panties and these breasts and let the men look at me. And they give you the stamp so fast.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. They're like, just get out of here, you ugly.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh.

[Tammy Brown]

Whereas I used to be like, I do comedy. Like, what kind? Where.

[Trixie Mattel]

Tell me a joke. It's like, okay, have you ever had that one? Tell me a joke. It's the most horrifying question.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Why don't you just turn around? I've got to go, yeah, yeah, horrible. Make them turn around and you go, there you go. It's a joke, you see?

[Tammy Brown]

And also. But it's also, if it's like a straight guy, I'm trying to gauge what they would think is funny. My pronouns are, kiss my ass.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Why.

[Tammy Brown]

Don'T they wear mini skirts in San Francisco because their balls will show.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, I love that. That's the way to say it. Dingly. Dingly.

[Tammy Brown]

My. I. I was told that by a family member and it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, my God.

[Tammy Brown]

When I was a kid, I was like, in shock, and now I'm like, it's kind of content. Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Or like, what, did they plain strike the oil or something? Mud daubers, they say, are you a mud dauber?

[Tammy Brown]

Mud dauber. Is that like a butt?

[Trixie Mattel]

That is so gross.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You never heard that?

[Tammy Brown]

Have you heard people sitting on the dick is painting the dick? I'm gon paint.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, my God. That's called pull plunge.

[Trixie Mattel]

No more painting. We're not painting anymore.

[Tammy Brown]

Painting. We're not.

[Trixie Mattel]

We're not painting anymore.

[Tammy Brown]

We're not.

[Trixie Mattel]

Thomas.

[Tammy Brown]

We're not.

[Trixie Mattel]

Painter of brown. No, we're not doing that.

[Tammy Brown]

Painter of brown.

[Trixie Mattel]

I think that is so disgusting.

[Ryan Reynolds]

What?

[Trixie Mattel]

Painting the dick with your.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, you know, it's you. Y' all were reminding me of. You remember my show with the guns? You love that.

[Tammy Brown]

I do. She had a show where she had us all close our eyes and then she was like getting us to relax and imagine something and then played loud gunshots in the theater.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But we're gonna do this year. I have another one of those. I'm pulling it back to this in the theory. We're gonna have another story, but it's a different story. You'll have to come to the show.

[Trixie Mattel]

It's gonna be the sound of things.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, but I was thinking about Tijuana down there. And by the way, if you want to go to Mexico, go across the border. The airport's right across. You just walk right into the airport. It's genius. Okay, And. But we were there and. And San Ysidro, California is. San Ysidro is right over there. And that's where all those kids went down. And they were getting their soft serve ice creams and all that stuff. And the mass gun shooting in the 80s shot them all down. And I think about the kids there in the soft serve and they got shot. And that soft serve, the ice cream just coming out of the machine all over their body, chilling them.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, my God.

[Tammy Brown]

Okay, so it's like all these drunk, gay, you know, white, rich man p. Town is a very rich vacation.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes, it is.

[Tammy Brown]

White, older rich men, they love Tammy and they're all have their eyes closed and they're like waiting for the punchline and gunshots start and they open their eyes and Tammy's going like this. And it was like silent and shocking, which I'm sure is what you meant for it to be. Yeah, of course.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's a political statement on gun violence.

[Tammy Brown]

And then she was like. And that's what it's like to be in America right now.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Now. Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

And then she was like, hit it. And then it was a song.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

It was like. I think it was Geisha. Geisha was next.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, Geisha. Geisha. Across the sea in the land of a rising sun Cherry blossoms, Jerry Blossoms what's your.

[Tammy Brown]

Can you. Without, I guess, spoiling the new show? What's the narrative experience?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's the. It's a feeling of love. Ethereal, so to speak. And then there will be fantasy. I'm gonna put them in one of these. Trance again.

[Trixie Mattel]

Amazing.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And then we'll do mini hits. We'll include. Because I have so much material already. So many songs. And then. But. And people want them.

[Trixie Mattel]

They do.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Like, their favorites is like, what is it? Porta Potty Prostitute.

[Trixie Mattel]

Love.

[Tammy Brown]

Porta Potty Prostitutes.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And then we have. And like Daddy's Makeover. We're putting that one in this year.

[Trixie Mattel]

Daddy's Makeover.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Love that.

[Tammy Brown]

Porta Potty Prostitute is horny.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Good stuff. Getting down like Cunan on stairs.

[Trixie Mattel]

Bang, bang.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Versace. Gun violence.

[Tammy Brown]

Gun. For real. I mean, I think about guns every day.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And it. I'm moving the shows more into. With visual.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Visual. With, you know, there's this visual videos playing behind me because I don't have a band or anything to back me up. So it's easier with the video. And I just play the videos in the background and get down to the songs. And then of course, we do some conversation in between each song.

[Trixie Mattel]

Fierce.

[Tammy Brown]

Can I tell you, I. That's one thing I miss about Provincetown is doing a show that really is just you and a light person.

[Trixie Mattel]

Low technique.

[Tammy Brown]

On one hand, it's more like, oh, God, if this flops, it's on me.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

On the other hand, if you can count on yourself, it's kind of nice to be like, yeah, all right. It's a one person thing.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. And people want that in Provincetown, right?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. I guess there's the divas over there. But the divas is a show out there.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Divas. Delta Miles, Billie Jean. Oh, there's that one too. The other girls. Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

Illusions.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Illusions.

[Trixie Mattel]

Illusions.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Shout out to them.

[Trixie Mattel]

Fierce. Thirsty Burlington.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Thirsty Burlington.

[Trixie Mattel]

One of my favorite names.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And she was singing share at your house. Shout out to Thirsty.

[Tammy Brown]

Thirsty Burlington.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Send her some love.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, Diana would bring Thirsty Home. When I was living with Diana one summer, she would bring Thirsty home. After bar closed. Bars there closed. Like, one. It's too early.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Two. Why are they. I guess they're like, put these fags to bed.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, it's like, you know, in Australia they close so early too. Five o'.

[Tammy Brown]

Clock.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Bye. Good bed.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Five o'.

[Tammy Brown]

Clock.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. In Australia, if you're out in certain parts, you out in the boonies or whatever, you can't find anywhere to eat. Yeah. Around five in the afternoon. It seems like they will shut things down in Australia a lot.

[Tammy Brown]

I guess. I'm also Goody Proctor, though, because when I'm in New York and I'm like.

[Trixie Mattel]

Did you say 4:00am yeah, Mama, you.

[Tammy Brown]

Out of your mind.

[Trixie Mattel]

And then you go to the after party till six.

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, and who's at the bar for tweakers?

[Trixie Mattel]

Tweakers. Always.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. Really?

[Trixie Mattel]

Absolutely.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm used to New York style like that.

[Trixie Mattel]

Gotta go to bed.

[Tammy Brown]

Or like Berlin when I used to. Nightclubs in Berlin. Hey, it's a Sunday. You're on at 2:30am no, that's when.

[Trixie Mattel]

They go in the room. In the pee room and all that stuff. No, ma'.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Am. And then y' all come out and dance in it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Tammy Brown]

The room.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, the.

[Tammy Brown]

To the room.

[Trixie Mattel]

Use that.

[Tammy Brown]

Use the gals bathroom in drag.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, I always do. I like it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You know, I. I do like that.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And transsexuals and sports. How do I think of that? I think of it as maybe like indigenous people would have. Have this kind of a mixed thing and they're. And you would use them as higher level, a higher competitor.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Something special to add to your team.

[Tammy Brown]

There you go. Unfortunately, she and I don't represent a high level of athleticism, so.

[Trixie Mattel]

How dare you?

[Tammy Brown]

We don't.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That's okay.

[Tammy Brown]

You notice we never get booked on.

[Trixie Mattel]

Espn, which is so strange. It's very confusing.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Espn.

[Tammy Brown]

Can I.

[Trixie Mattel]

What?

[Tammy Brown]

We have to start campaigning now to do something for the Olympics.

[Trixie Mattel]

I know, I know, I know. You're gonna be in la.

[Tammy Brown]

You're gonna be in la. We have to do. You have to do something for the gymnastics. I know.

[Trixie Mattel]

I want you, but they won't let me.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You'll get it.

[Trixie Mattel]

They won't let me. Those.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You can get it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Those whores.

[Tammy Brown]

There's got to be some kind of woke. Some kind of woke Olympics experience that you and I can talk.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'll get you in there. I don't see why not.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, we could work it out.

[Ryan Reynolds]

What is It a Kennedy Award anymore. Poor Mama Rue won't be able to get one of those. Well, not that she'd be in drag anyways, but Kennedy Center.

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, yeah, because they pulled their drag show, right.

[Ryan Reynolds]

They're. They're pulling that, and the people are afraid to go do the. The World Pride there too.

[Tammy Brown]

I'm going. I don't give a.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Did you already get booked for that?

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, I have. Solid. Yeah, I'm going. Okay. RuPaul's DJing.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, she is?

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

Cunty.

[Tammy Brown]

I'm doing it, but I'm doing Tuesday, like, of World Pride, so I think World Pride's more the weekend. I'm like, one of the opening.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay, okay. Fierce.

[Tammy Brown]

But I don't know if we're too scared to go do Pride. It sounds corny, but, like, they win.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Yep.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I know that they were supposedly pulling back. Backers pulling out and stuff like that.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, that doesn't surprise me. Corporations, of course.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

They're spying now that it's not trendy. They're all building their. Yeah, yeah, of course.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know what happened. They don't want our disposable incomes anymore.

[Tammy Brown]

No. That when AOC or someone gets elected, they'll roll out the, you know, Rainbow Pride suits. They'll. They'll roll out.

[Trixie Mattel]

Everything's gay, gay, gay, gay.

[Tammy Brown]

But for the next few years, people are gonna be pulling all that and being like. Like what? Oh, we didn't notice. Sorry.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Oh, Lord have prides are gonna have to go back to getting sponsored by, like, the low level corporations.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. Like condoms.

[Tammy Brown]

Cellular.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, I love condoms. Sign me up. Let's blow a bubble.

[Tammy Brown]

The girls got to use more condoms.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes, they do.

[Tammy Brown]

Nobody's wanted to use condoms anymore.

[Trixie Mattel]

No. Because it's all loads. Everybody wants a load.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, my God.

[Tammy Brown]

Do you. You. You want. When you hook up, do you need the com.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, I don't hook up, first of all.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I just don't need all that business.

[Tammy Brown]

Right.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I just. It's not my style, you know, I was on. What was that? That dating site, the one that the straight people used to hook up on.

[Trixie Mattel]

Tinder.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Tinder. Swipe, swipe. Oh, my God. That's okay.

[Tammy Brown]

I think Tinder used to be more wholesome, and now it's. Now it's.

[Trixie Mattel]

Now it's just hookup.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. Yeah. I just can't do that. I don't know. I want to. I want to finesse. I want to talk to her. I want.

[Trixie Mattel]

I really romantic.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm a romanticizer.

[Trixie Mattel]

Good for you, huh?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Big time.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Renaissential.

[Trixie Mattel]

Ren. Essential. Oh, I like that. Fierce.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I like the connection that's most important to me is the connection I have with people.

[Tammy Brown]

Right.

[Ryan Reynolds]

The most. That's what turns me on the most. Like, I have some friends that I see and I talk to, and it's all about this connection I have with them.

[Tammy Brown]

Well, that's why sometimes the hookups aren't giving, because they might be hot, but there's really no connection.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah. Might as well just, like, jerk off with a dummy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

What am I. Oh, let me stand here.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

Buck a squash, people on the Internet. Noodles and stuff.

[Trixie Mattel]

Absolutely.

[Tammy Brown]

Squash. Heat up some cup of ramen. Stick your.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Stick your. Stick your dingling in there.

[Tammy Brown]

Yes, the cup of ramen. Actually, I think it's called cup ramen.

[Trixie Mattel]

Do you know this ramen? Oh, I didn't know that.

[Tammy Brown]

We all say cup of noodles ramen, but. Oh, wait, it's cup of Noodles. Cup noodles?

[Trixie Mattel]

Really?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's not Cup O.

[Tammy Brown]

Look it up, Tracy. What do they do? I think it's cup noodles.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Prick the. Prick the dick or something. Or prick the noodle.

[Tammy Brown]

Or.

[Ryan Reynolds]

What do they say, huh? Prick the lasagna.

[Trixie Mattel]

Cup noodles.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's cop noodles.

[Tammy Brown]

Isn't that crazy? What is that phenomenon where you. You think it's one thing, but it's not written that way. Your brain just fills it in. You know what I'm talking about?

[Ryan Reynolds]

And what do they do? Stick their noodles in. Stick their dingling. And I saw.

[Tammy Brown]

Remember last year, this guy was like, I'm gonna all these different pastas and let you know which one's the type. Pussy. Nick.

[Trixie Mattel]

Damn.

[Ryan Reynolds]

The Mandela effect. Like Nelson Mandela.

[Tammy Brown]

Fierce, Tammy. Fans of yours, obviously, are so passionate, they don't need to be told where to find you. But if they want to see you this summer, how can they get to you?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well. Oh, how? They can get tickets at the Red Room. They're in Provincetown. Red Room. And please, let's push ethereal. I'm ready for Kelly Clarkson show.

[Tammy Brown]

Hell, yeah.

[Trixie Mattel]

How can they find me?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I want to go on Kelly Clarkson. Can you help me win that?

[Tammy Brown]

Yeah, I've only been on that one time.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Huh. Well, you were on there recently on the sofa.

[Tammy Brown]

I could barely get on it.

[Trixie Mattel]

Well, I see Raja on there.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I want to get on there. Yeah, Raja and a bunch of the other transvestites were on there.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Tammy Brown]

There's this picture of me on there where I'm on the couch, but I guess my legs are open, and my legs are. Are Completely spread out.

[Trixie Mattel]

I didn't see that porn.

[Tammy Brown]

And I'm talking to her about, like, I don't know.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. I thought you were laying, like, this is what I saw.

[Tammy Brown]

It was like that with a leg out. Can I be honest? It was a weird day anyway because I was promoting Trixie Motel and we'd already separated.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, right.

[Tammy Brown]

And so I was like, do you believe in the magic of love, Kelly? And I didn't know she had gotten a divorce either. So we were all just. Like I said something. Like I said, kelly, you know, people get divorces over changing the wallpaper in the powder room. You know what I mean? And I know she just got a divorce. Leave it to me. Well, would you leave it me? So.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, well, can. Is that fair to talk about divorces?

[Tammy Brown]

Well, had I known she had recently had one, I wouldn't have made a joke at all about getting a divorce.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

But I do know that renovations stress people out.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes.

[Tammy Brown]

So as you know.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yes.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, people like my Tammy Brown facial impressions. They wrote about those in the LA Times.

[Tammy Brown]

I have.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, you do. In the bathroom.

[Tammy Brown]

Can people still buy those?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, of course. I'm selling them right now.

[Trixie Mattel]

Where do they buy them?

[Tammy Brown]

Best pieces of Tammy Merch.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I just. Do you go to Instagram and then DM me their direct message if they don't know what that is? And I'm doing the embroidered ones. Prices on those. And I just had the gallery show in Galveston, Texas.

[Trixie Mattel]

Amazing.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And I sold all the rag queens and I sold all the facial impressions.

[Trixie Mattel]

Cunty.

[Tammy Brown]

They're one of a kind.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

And they're a good gift because, like, if you don't know someone's size, you don't know their T shirt. Whatever.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tammy Brown]

It's one of a kind. It's beautiful.

[Ryan Reynolds]

There you go.

[Tammy Brown]

You're one of a kind.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I know. That's what I wanted. Oh, thank you. Kelly and I want to do this. What you two are doing. That's what she's building the show up to do. Get me on the road with her.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, oh, like the little duo act.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That's what we want to do because we have so much fun doing it as well.

[Trixie Mattel]

Yeah, you guys are great together. You guys are great together. Fierce.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Here we were.

[Trixie Mattel]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Did you watch the Saturday Night Live? What is Saturday Night Live? 50 Year Reunion Special?

[Tammy Brown]

I did.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Good for you.

[Tammy Brown]

I like to see Paul Simon.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Paul Simon, Paul Simon. And Jack Nicholson was sitting there.

[Trixie Mattel]

Oh, really?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I love Jack Nicholson.

[Tammy Brown]

Bye, Tammy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Bye.