U Up? Podcast — Episode Summary

Who Covers Travel Costs After a Breakup?

Podcast: U Up?
Hosts: Jordana Abraham & Jared Freid
Date: December 17, 2025

Episode Overview

This episode dives deep into the thorny territory of post-breakup travel costs, dating etiquette, gift-giving during the holidays, and the social expectations that persist in modern relationships. Through witty banter and candid listener letters, Jordana and Jared navigate awkward social conundrums with humor and insight—never shying away from the nuances of modern dating, self-esteem, and the evolving gender roles in relationships.

Main Discussion Segments

1. Cozy Catch-Ups & The Importance of Friendship Plans

Timestamps: 01:30–08:16

• Jordana recounts a recent girls' retreat upstate, complete with movie debates (“Is George Clooney still hot?”), sound baths, and cozy dinners.
• She highlights the mental health benefits of group getaways:
  • “Half of the beauty of a plan with friends is looking forward to the plan. The group chat that leads into the plan... this is a month of wait and good, I’m so excited to see you all.” – Jordana (07:50)
• Jared shares touring stories and family visits, touching on multi-generational family finances and etiquette around who pays when dining out with much older relatives.
  • Notable quote: “Whoever planned it, pays it.” – Jared (11:07)

2. Gift-Giving Etiquette in Friendships and Partnerships

Timestamps: 13:29–20:49

• The hosts discuss their own holiday gift exchange, unveiling gifts purchased via Uber Eats, and the thought process behind choosing practical, thoughtful, and non-gag gifts.
  • Jordana loved her spa kit; Jared gets a theragun-style massager for post-flight stiffness.
  • “I like a poo poo platter of gifts.” – Jared (17:22)
  • “There’s nothing better than getting just multi… oh wow, a real deep mask gift set!” – Jordana (17:04)
• Both extol the virtues of thoughtful, easy gifting and the joy of giving friends something that “feels luxurious, but you’re not paying an exorbitant amount” (Jordana, 21:00).
• The importance of small, meaningful holiday gifting for friends and partners.

3. Spotify Wrapped, the 'Ick,' and Modern Self-Love

Timestamps: 23:44–34:22

• Listener letter: Is it weird or just “icky” if your boyfriend’s top Spotify song is his own?
  • Both hosts argue it’s a harmless quirk—especially for creative types.
  • “It would be more embarrassing if you knew how many times you looked at your own Instagram story.” – Jared (30:22)
  • The broader idea: Monitoring or celebrating yourself (phone background pics, music listens, etc.) can seem egotistical, but often stems from pride or creative self-review.
  • “I almost think it’s a bigger red flag that his picture is of himself [on his phone],” reflects Jordana (31:51), questioning the comfort level with self-celebration in relationships.

4. Gendered Dynamics of Breakup Narratives — Alex Earle & Celebrity Relationships

Timestamps: 34:31–48:13

• Jared launches into commentary on social media’s reaction to Alex Earle and Braxton Berrios’ breakup:
  • Observes the “go girl, onto bigger and better things” response, contrasting it with typical reactions if roles were reversed.
  • Ponders: Are men and women judged differently for post-breakup ambition or “trading up”?
  • Quotes:
    • “When women do it, it’s said out loud and everyone’s like, cool with it… I’m not crying for Braxton, but men in this world… are hearing the cheering…” – Jared (41:55)
    • “If the male stock is rising and ours is… declining, our incentive is to commit earlier.” – Jordana (43:25)
  • Both reflect on audience reactions and double standards rather than blaming individuals: “I never fault the person—I fault the audience… The audience is also the one that’s writing to us, ‘why won’t these men commit?’” – Jared (47:27)

5. Dating Etiquette: Who Pays After a Breakup-Canceled Trip?

Timestamps: 50:36–59:01

• Listener dilemma: She planned an expensive destination wedding trip with a new boyfriend—who then broke up with her weeks before. Should he pay his part of the resulting hotel/flight costs?
• Hosts reach a consensus:
  • The considerate thing would have been for the dumper to proactively offer to offset costs.
  • Jared: “When you’re entitled to something, don’t look for additional sympathy… make it logical, make it less emotional.” (58:04)
  • Advice: Give a clear, unemotional breakdown of costs and make a reasonable request for reimbursement.
  • Jordana: “I think she’s entitled to something… if I’m the one ending it, I would want to settle up.” (57:06)
• Both joke about the need for “breakup insurance” (59:01).

6. Red Flag or Dealbreaker? Listener Dating Scenarios

Timestamps: 60:08–77:13

a. Family Amazon Account Past Adulthood

• Husband still shares an Amazon account with his mom and brother instead of with his wife.
  • Both find it suspect but not a dealbreaker. It may indicate reluctance to merge lives or simply inertia.
  • “If I was unsure of the relationship, I’m not joining your Prime account.” – Jared (64:19)

b. Hidden Apartment After Months of Dating

• Four months in, a woman has never been invited to a boyfriend’s place.
  • Hosts agree: This is weird and increasingly suspicious.
  • “The longer this goes, the more uncomfortable I get. I’m more turned off by you hiding this place than I am whatever’s going to be behind that door.” – Jared (73:05)
  • “I would break up with someone over that—that’s weird.” – Jordana (75:07)

c. Spit Cleaning the Table

• Boyfriend spits on the table to clean a stain with his sleeve, ignoring actual cleaning supplies.
  • Both find this to be a classic, if harmless, “red flag” rooted in childish or TV-learned behavior.
  • “It is a red flag if your boyfriend was instructed on how to be an adult by the TV show Looney Tunes.” – Jared (75:57)

Notable Quotes & Moments

• On Friendship & Making Plans:
  • “Half of the beauty of a plan with friends is looking forward to the plan. The group chat that leads into the plan…” – Jordana (07:50)
• On Spotify Wrapped Exposing Self:
  • “It would be more embarrassing if you knew how many times you looked at your own Instagram story.” – Jared (30:22)
• On Gender & Success Post-Breakup:
  • “When women do it, it's said out loud and everyone’s like, cool with it... I’m not crying for Braxton, but men in this world… are hearing the cheering…” – Jared (41:55)
• On Breakup Etiquette:
  • “Make it math for him.” – Jared (57:23)
• On Merging Lives:
  • “If I was unsure of the relationship, I’m not joining your Prime account.” – Jared (64:19)

Episode Flow & Tone

The episode is characteristically playful, honest, and reflective, packed with personal anecdotes, pop culture observations, and thoughtful debate over modern dating standards. The hosts maintain their trademark banter and sarcasm, frequently poking fun at each other and themselves while always drilling down into the subtleties behind every relationship norm or red flag.

Conclusion

From etiquette around post-breakup finances to the red flags of never seeing a partner’s apartment, the U Up? hosts blend real-world advice with comedic takes—making this episode both entertaining and informative for anyone navigating dating, breakups, and the many in-between moments of modern love.