Podcast
Speak Shame
Hosted by Dr Connie Kerali · EN
*TRIGGER WARNING: Sexual Violence*
Dr Connie Kerali was drugged and raped by a man that she was dating in the summer of 2015. She was silenced by shame for 3 years until she heard one woman courageously share her survivor story. A few days later, she reported what happened to her to the police.
In recognition of the impact one story can have, Speak Shame is a collection of stories that shame didn't want you to hear. Stories of hope, inspiration and becoming.
30episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
Breaking Generational Cycles: Poonnamme Speaks On Her Experience As A 1st Born British-Asian
Feb 2601:34:59Tap to summarizeIn this episode of Speak Shame we discuss sexual violence, attempted suicide, and eating disorders and with support links are provided below. Dr Connie interviews Poonnamme, a Sikh woman raised between the UK and Punjab, with over 35 years in health and social care, who now also facilitates Kundalini Shakti activation. She shares how being the first-born girl and only child brought intense pressure tied to family honour and community expectations, including expectations around education and status. She describes being sexually assaulted at 17 by someone known to the family and a subsequent attempted suicide. She shares that at 18 she entered an arranged marriage and describes living “two lives” as a Western professional and a traditional subservient wife. Becoming a mother was a turning point in her decision to break cycles for her daughter. Poonnamme reflects on how her experiences shaped her voice, resilience, and ability to feel pride in both who she is and who she was. 01:40 Introducing Poonnamme04:43 Firstborn Expectations08:24 Schooling And Illness11:14 Career Dreams Clash12:51 Sexual Assault Silence16:25 Aftermath And Survival25:10 Arranged Marriage Begins26:02 Two Lives At Home & At Work29:09 A Manager Believes34:59 Leaving To Break Cycles36:49 Healing And Sharing41:42 Trauma In The Body43:23 Eating Disorder Spiral47:36 Crossroads With Substances56:20 Self Healing Awakening01:00:00 Launching Healing Practice01:03:37 Identity And Finding Voice01:13:56 Advice For Feeling Stuck01:21:02 Where To Find Poonnamme01:27:51 Remarkable Women And GratitudePOONNAMMEInstagram: @JagoSacredEnergyWebsite: JagoSacredEnergy.co.ukUK SUPPORT SERVICESIn an emergency, dial 999; for non-emergencies or dial 101 (UK only)Find your nearest NHS Sexual Assault Referral CentreFind an NHS Talking Therapy service near you or contact your GP surgeryCharities: Mind, The Samaritans, Rape Crisis, Women’s Aid, Victim SupportGET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
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Say It Out Loud: Finding Your Voice With Vasavi Kumar
Feb 1900:30:47Tap to summarizeIn this week’s episode of Speak Shame, Dr Connie Kerali speaks with Vasavi Kumar, licensed therapist, mindset coach, voice actor, TV host, and author of Say It Out Loud. Vasavi shares how she began to stop doubting herself and regain trust in her voice by developing an “immaculate” inner narrative - one that is kind, encouraging, and safe - so that external criticism no longer carries the same weight. She explains how her work has evolved over 15 years alongside her own personal growth, and how sharing the truth with emotion and precision helps her connect with clients who are on a similar path. Vasavi offers a practical example of challenging limiting beliefs by reframing the fear of raising prices for her Out Loud School. She also reflects on Bad Bunny’s Super Bowl performance as a reminder for women of colour and children of immigrants to stay true to their culture without whitewashing themselves for acceptance. Vasavi discusses how grief after her father’s death in May 2025 led her to temporarily silence herself, and how returning to speaking out loud helped her process emotions and reduce shame. She closes by emphasising that shame festers in silence and isolation, and that everyone needs a safe place to be witnessed and express themselves - one of the reasons she created the Out Loud School, which she notes is not therapy but is therapeutic.00:00 The impact of silencing yourself and why shame shrivels when voiced01:05 Introduction to Speak Shame and guest Vasavi Kumar03:45 Vasavi’s “first chapter”: ending self-doubt and trusting her voice07:00 Rewiring the inner narrative and treating yourself with respect12:40 Helping others while doing your own ongoing inner work15:40 How telling the truth and sharing personal stories attracts aligned clients19:10 A practical reframe: challenging limiting beliefs when raising prices27:10 Bad Bunny, authenticity, and refusing to whitewash culture for acceptance35:30 Grief, losing your voice after her father’s death, and returning to expression42:10 Why not using your voice affects mental, emotional, physical and financial wellbeing48:15 Finding a safe place to “say it out loud” and what Out Loud School offers55:10 Where to find Vasavi and her remarkable woman inspirationVASAVI KUMAR• Instagram: @MyNameIsVasavi• Website: vasavikumar.comGET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
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I'm Not A Failure: Faith Aisien-Ezugwu On Dyslexia & Developing Self-Compassion
Feb 1200:31:42Tap to summarizeIn this episode, host Dr Connie Kerali interviews Faith Aisien-Ezugwu, author of the poetry and spoken word book 'I Am Here' and host of the 'Re: Series' podcast. Faith shares her journey from growing up in Nigeria and overcoming feelings of inadequacy and being labeled a 'failure' as a child, to her successful career in business and events management. She discusses her struggles with dyslexia, the emotional challenges she faced, and how therapy helped her find self-compassion and self-worth. Faith offers advice to listeners on believing in themselves, recognising their strengths, and seeking the support they need. She also reflects on the importance of discussing mental health issues and breaking cultural stigmas. The episode concludes with a powerful reading from her book, 'I Am Here'.01:23 Meet Faith Aisien-Ezugwu02:34 Chapter One Poem05:07 Childhood and Culture09:22 Dyslexia and Self Work12:59 Writing the Book15:30 Advice to Younger Self18:10 Mentoring and Hard Work20:29 Parenting and Breaking Silence24:09 Therapy and Self Compassion27:01 Remarkable Women Inspiration29:56 Final Reading and Wrap UpFAITH AISIEN-EZUGWUWebsite: FaithAisienEzugwu.comInstagram: @inkwellfaithPodcast: The Re: SeriesGET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.
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Believing Your Body Has Failed You: Emily Silva Hockstra On Infertility, Grief & Healing
Jan 2900:29:17Tap to summarizeIn this week's episode, Dr Connie Kerali interviews Emily Silva Hockstra, a five-time author and spiritual life coach. Emily shares her journey from an anxiety-ridden child to a successful author and coach. She discusses her personal experiences, including suffering a miscarriage at 18, transitioning from a corporate career to wine tasting, and eventually pursuing her passion for writing full-time. Emily delves into the profound impact of grief and shame on her life after a diagnosis of primary ovarian insufficiency meant that she was unable to conceive, detailing how therapy, yoga, and self-discovery have been crucial in her healing journey. She also talks about the creation of her books, such as 'Moonlight Gratitude' and 'Sunset Gratitude,' and emphasises the importance of seeking help and finding inner peace. The episode closes with Emily reflecting on her sources of inspiration and offering advice for those navigating their own struggles.01:06 Meet Emily Silva Hockstra02:09 Chapter One: Origins03:10 Corporate to Wine Life05:27 Quitting to Create06:04 Life Coaching Begins07:04 First Book Breakthrough08:52 Building the Book Series10:29 POI Diagnosis and Grief13:49 Day to Day Shame Spiral15:42 Therapy and Body Healing18:48 Vulnerability Takeaways20:36 Advice for Listeners22:14 Unpacking Shame Stories23:50 Coaching After Grief25:46 Stay Connected Online26:10 Final Reflections27:35 Remarkable Woman TributeEMILY SILVA HOCKSTRAInstagran: @SoulsAdventuresWebsite: SoulsAdventures.comGET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.
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High-Achieving, Still Unworthy? Dr. Adia Gooden On Cultivating Unconditional Self-Worth
Jan 1500:35:45Tap to summarizeIn this week's episode of Speak Shame, Dr Connie Kerali interviews Dr. Adia Gooden, a licensed clinical psychologist and expert on self-worth, self-compassion, and mental health. Dr. Adia shares her journey from growing up in Pasadena, California with professional parents, to becoming a renowned psychologist and speaker. She delves into the impact of early life challenges on her sensitivity to others' feelings, and how her academic and personal struggles with worthiness guided her career choice. Dr. Adia and Dr Connie discuss the importance of understanding self-worth stories, practicing self-compassion, and the layers of performance and vulnerability. Dr. Adia also opens up about her personal experiences with shame and depression, emphasising the need to reconnect with one's unconditional self-worth. The episode concludes with practical steps for listeners to begin their journey towards self-worth and self-compassion, along with a tribute to Dr. Adia's inspiring grandmother.01:20 Introducing Dr Adia Gooden02:53 Chapter One: Pasadena Roots03:29 Early Seeds of Self Doubt05:29 Why She Became a Psychologist09:12 Chasing Worth Through Achievement12:31 Rewrite Your Self Worth Stories15:27 The Masks We Wear17:56 First Steps Into Vulnerability21:48 Four Steps of Self Compassion25:42 A Shame Story and Healing29:17 Unconditional Self Worth Defined31:16 How to Work With Dr Adia32:43 Remarkable Woman: Nana TributeDR. ADIA GOODENEmail: DrAdia@DrAdiaGooden.comWebsite: DrAdiaGooden.comGET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.
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When Women Get Sick: Rebecca Bloom on Removing the Shame Around Asking For Help
Nov 600:36:17Tap to summarizeIn this week's episode, we welcome Rebecca Bloom, a Yale and NYU-educated patient and workplace advocate, and author of 'When Women Get Sick'. Rebecca discusses her journey from a legal career specialising in employee benefits to her long-standing role as a patient advocate at Bay Area Cancer Connections. She shares personal experiences that fuelled her advocacy, including her family's battle with breast cancer and her own high-risk health journey. The conversation highlights the importance of building a support team, the challenges women face in healthcare, and the need for proactive planning. Rebecca also touches on her work as a storytelling coach and emphasises the critical nature of mental health and mindfulness in the healing process. 01:16 Meet Rebecca Bloom03:05 Rebecca’s Origin Story05:33 Why She Wrote When Women Get Sick07:56 Karen’s Insurance Battle11:12 Shame and Asking for Help15:13 Mindfulness That Actually Helps19:46 Rebecca’s High Risk Journey22:29 Draft Your Support Team25:25 Plan Before You’re Sick29:17 Hope for Women’s Health31:39 Key Takeaways and Where to Find Her33:42 Remarkable Women Shoutouts REBECCA BLOOM· Instagram: @WhenWomenGetSick· Website: WhenWomenGetSick.com GET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.
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Religious Shame & Abortions: Gabby Long on Her Body, Her Choice
Oct 2200:37:06Tap to summarizeIn this episode of Speak Shame, Dr Connie interviews Gabby Long, a reproductive rights advocate, mother, and healthcare storyteller. Gabby shares her journey from growing up in central Florida to becoming an outreach organiser for 'A Woman's Choice,' an independent abortion provider. She discusses her family's background in activism and her early volunteer experiences. Gabby also opens up about her personal experience with abortion, highlighting the emotional and practical challenges she faced. She speaks passionately about her work in reproductive health advocacy, the importance of community support, and the need for accessible healthcare. The discussion also covers Gabby's involvement with organisations like We Testify and the Floridians Protecting Freedoms Coalition, and she offers advice to those going through similar challenges. Gabby emphasises the importance of voting, mutual aid, and community building to drive societal change. 01:04 Meet Gabby Long02:32 Chapter one: roots03:51 Growing up and volunteering07:24 Young love and pregnancy08:03 Choosing abortion with Nana11:13 Crisis centres and clinic hurdles15:20 From patient to advocate17:49 Florida politics and access21:04 What is hyperemesis?23:59 Advice and finding community27:52 Lived experience at work32:16 Mutual aid and voting US BASED SUPPORT SERVICES· Website: We Testify; · Instagram: @WeTestify UK BASED SUPPORT SERVICES· British Pregnancy Advisory Service (BPAS)· National Health Service (NHS) Abortion Support GET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.Hello Remarkable Woman, are you tired of letting a secret story run your life? Join The Storytellers Club, a free membership space, to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.
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How Anxiety & Shame Shaped My Life as a Doctor - Dr Alison Smith's Story
Oct 800:40:34Tap to summarizeIn this week's episode, Dr Connie Kerali interviews Dr Alison Smith, founder of Earth and Bloom, a coaching practice supporting doctors and healthcare professionals. Dr Alison shares her journey from a GP with over 20 years of experience to a coach who blends nature, creativity, and one-to-one facilitation. She discusses her challenging childhood, her initial struggles in medicine, and how coaching transformed her life, unlocking her creativity and aligning her values. Dr Alison and Dr Connie delve into the topics of shame and anxiety in the medical profession, highlighting the need for support and open dialogue. Dr Alison also talks about her current work, including one-on-one coaching and sister circles, emphasising the importance of nature and community in healing and personal growth. 01:15 Meet Dr Alison Smith03:22 Chapter One: Childhood Worlds07:40 Path Into Medicine12:49 Anxiety and Loneliness as a GP14:21 Coaching and Nature Reset17:47 Shame and Anxiety in Medicine21:36 Thinking Environment and Listening25:40 Advice for Doctors in Shame27:52 How to Work With Alison29:59 Sister Circles and Retreats32:24 Humiliation Culture and Hope35:52 Remarkable Woman and Poem DR ALISON SMITH· Instagram: @Earth_and_Bloom· Website: https://www.earthandbloom.uk· LinkedIn: Dr Alison Smith GET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.Hello Remarkable Woman, are you tired of letting a secret story run your life? Join The Storytellers Club, a free membership space, to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.
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Dying For An Abortion: Kayleigh on the Impact of Abortion Bans
Sep 2400:23:26Tap to summarizeIn this episode of Speak Shame, we meet Kayleigh, a reproductive justice advocate, abortion storyteller, and program coordinator at Fund Texas Choice. Kayleigh discusses her personal journey from growing up in a military family and surviving domestic and sexual violence, to finding her calling in supporting Texans seeking out-of-state abortion care. She shares her own abortion experience, the ongoing struggles due to restrictive abortion laws, and the critical need for emotional and logistical support for individuals facing systemic barriers. Kayleigh highlights the transformative power of sharing abortion stories to dismantle stigma and offers insights for those seeking support or considering an abortion. 01:13 Meet Kayleigh02:01 Chapter One: Origins03:56 College and Abuse Realisation04:29 Choosing Abortion07:00 Finding Support08:40 Helping Texans Travel10:29 The Fall of Roe12:04 What Clients Face Now13:34 No Judgment Advocacy15:07 Advice and Resources17:06 Power of Storytelling18:52 Where to Get Help20:05 Bans Are Killing People21:27 Inspired by Ancestors US BASED SUPPORT SERVICES· We Testify; Instagram: @WeTestify· Fund Texas Choice· Frontera Fund· Lilith Fund· Texas Equal Access Fund· Exhale Pro-Voice UK BASED SUPPORT SERVICES· British Pregnancy Advisory Service (BPAS)· National Health Service (NHS) Abortion Support GET IN TOUCHJoin the community:@DrConnieKerali on InstagramSign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.Hello Remarkable Woman, are you tired of letting a secret story run your life? Join The Storytellers Club, a free membership space, to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.
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I Was Intolerant to My Life: Annalie Howling on Becoming Unapologetic
Sep 1000:44:09Tap to summarizeIn this week’s episode, Dr Connie sits down with Annalie Howling, a highly qualified performance coach with over 20 years of experience working with business leaders, elite athletes, and members of the armed forces, including ex-UK Special Forces. Annalie discusses her journey from a turbulent childhood to becoming a sought-after speaker, author, and EMDR certified global practitioner. She shares her insights on how shame and her people-pleasing nature have impacted her life and work. Annalie also elaborates on her book ‘Unapologetic: Unshackle Your Shame. Reclaim Your Power,’ and her personal experiences, including her breakthrough moment during a training in San Francisco and the importance of community and vulnerability. She concludes with her latest ventures, including retreats in Lisbon and France, aimed at fostering genuine connections and personal growth. 00:00 Introduction to Annalie Howling01:18 Annalie's Life Story02:17 Overcoming a Traumatic Childhood06:26 The Turning Point: Burnout and Recovery07:07 The Journey to Becoming a Coach12:24 The Good Girl Syndrome and People Pleasing17:30 Understanding the Fawn Response18:08 Connecting with Clients Through Shared Experiences22:58 Overcoming Shame and Embracing Vulnerability23:39 The Power of Sharing Stories24:12 The Role of Shame in Relationships24:46 Liberation Through Transparency26:09 The Patriarchy and Shame27:17 Cultural Narratives and Self-Sabotage29:15 Supporting Each Other and Building Connections31:27 Practical Advice for Overcoming Shame36:35 Annalie's Work and Retreats40:40 Final Thoughts and Gratitude ANNALIE HOWLING· Instagram: @AnnalieHowling GET IN TOUCHJoin the community:- @DrConnieKerali on Instagram- Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.- The Storytellers Club is an uplifting, supportive membership space where Remarkable Women rediscover their worth through story, creativity & connection. Find out more here.
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