Podcast
Proxy with Yowei Shaw
Hosted by Yowei Shaw · EN
Proxy investigates the weird, specific feelings that run our lives and world — sometimes by finding someone who gets it, sometimes by reporting from the emotions beat. Hosted by Yowei Shaw, former co-host and senior producer of Invisibilia.
We’ll be back with new cases this fall — and we’ll be dropping a few treats in the feed this summer. Follow the show so you don’t miss the next case.
Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw
Get in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com
If you’re new, try: Bisexual Wife Guy, Yowei Can't Speak Bro, or Jane Doesn't Like Her Dogs.
55episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
Heather Knows What Happens After You Die (What's It Like To Be... with Dan Heath)
3d ago00:41:14Summary readyWe’re sharing an episode of What It’s Like to Be… from New York Times bestselling business book author Dan Heath. On the podcast, Dan explores the world of work, one profession at a time, and interviews people who love what they do. He finds out: How does a stand-up comedian come up with new material? Does a cattle rancher ever get attached to certain calves? What are the clues that suggest fraud to a forensic accountant? If you’ve ever met someone whose work you were curious about, and you had 100 nosy questions but were too polite to ask… this is the show for you. In this preview, Dan talks with a funeral director about the strangest request for a viewing she’s ever handled, what it’s like to do hair and makeup for a body, and what the hardest situations are for her to handle. You can find more episodes of “What It’s Like to Be…” at https://link.mgln.ai/proxydanheath
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Kaitlin Lost Her Ambition (The Heart)
1w ago00:17:59Summary readyKaitlin Prest is one of the OG art weirdos of podcasting — creator of The Heart, the acclaimed queer feminist show about bodies, gender, power, intimacy, and the mysterious emotional terrain between people.But these days, Kaitlin is not pitching ambitious projects or chasing the next career milestone. She’s living with her parents in the suburbs of Ontario, making what she calls “a very simple, playful, humble offering.” This week, while we work on new Proxy cases for the fall, we’re sharing the first episode of Kaitlin’s new series Suburban Paradise: a strange, tender, sound-rich diary about adulthood, failure, money, art, moving back home, and making a “ta-da list” with your dad. From the episode: — Listen to The Heart — Follow @kaitlinprest on Instagram— Donate to The Mermaid Palace
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Taelor Doesn't Want to Have Sex
2w ago01:00:03Summary readyThe case of the asexual woman who wants romantic partnership with no sex. Taelor wants a partner who wants what she wants: closeness, commitment, emotional intimacy, a life together. Just not sex.But years of dating as an asexual woman has left Taelor wondering if what she wants is too specific to find. Does she keep trying? And if love without sex isn’t possible for her, how does she cope? How do you grieve a life you still want but aren’t sure you’ll get?In this episode, we find Taelor a proxy: an asexual woman who's been married for 12 years without having to compromise on sex. Together, they talk about boundaries, loneliness, and how to keep fighting for the love you want when the world keeps telling you your version of it doesn't count. From the episode:— The Ace Couple podcast that Courtney hosts with her partner Royce— Courtney Lane's work as a Victorian hair artist and historianNew to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or Alex's Husband Is Too Straight, another episode about wrestling with attraction and longterm romance outside the usual script.For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishawVisit — proxypodcast.comGet in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
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Sam Doesn't Know How to Be Rich
Jun 1600:58:16Summary readyThe case of the progressive rich guy who doesn’t know what to do with his money.Sam grew up middle class, built a company, sold it, and suddenly found himself with more money than he ever expected to have.But instead of feeling free, Sam feels stuck. He doesn’t want to become the kind of rich person he used to judge. He doesn’t want money to change his relationships. He doesn’t want to hoard it. He doesn’t even want to talk about it.In this episode, we find Sam a proxy: David Steely, who also came into a lot of money and had to figure out how to live with it. Together, they talk about secrecy, guilt, redistribution, enoughness, and the lonely, morally complicated question: what are you supposed to do when you have more than you need?From the episode:— David Steely — Sam’s proxy, who also came into significant wealth and had to figure out what to do with it— Resource Generation — an organization for young people with wealth and class privilege working toward wealth redistribution— Showing Up for Racial Justice (SURJ) — a group that organizes white people for racial and economic justiceNew to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or Mic Chooses the Wrong Life, a story about regret, comparison, and the fantasy of the unlived life.For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishawVisit — proxypodcast.comGet in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
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Alex's Husband Is Too Straight
Jun 200:51:13Summary readyThe case of the person who worries their husband still sees them as his wife. Alex is nonbinary, and their husband Henry is a straight cis man. Henry has been supportive through every step of Alex’s transition — pronouns, testosterone, top surgery — but Alex worries: if Henry is straight, does that mean he still sees Alex as a woman?In this episode, we find Alex two proxies: Elvis, a trans man who transitioned inside his long-term relationship, and Ryan, Elvis’s straight cis husband. Together, they talk about labels, desire, dysphoric sex, and the tender, terrifying question underneath it all: will you still want me if I change?New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for another story about identity changing inside a relationship, or Yowei Can't Speak Bro, about the emotional rules of people who say “that’s cool."For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishawVisit — proxypodcast.comGet in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
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Yowei Can't Speak Bro
May 1900:51:36Summary readyThe case of the podcast host who can't speak bro.For the past twelve years, Yowei has been trying — and failing — to have a normal conversation with her husband's best friend. It's not for lack of goodwill. But somehow, every time, they can''t find a rhythm. Yowei's theory: he speaks bro, and she doesn't know how. In this episode, Yowei finds a proxy bro and gets a crash course in bro banter — the hidden rules and emotional logic behind the joking, shit-talking, and conversations that can last for hours without a single life update. From the episode:— Jason Stewart — podcaster, DJ, and co-host of How Long Gone. Follow him on Instagram and X @themjeans.— Scott Kiesling — professor of linguistics at the University of Pittsburgh, whose work explores masculinity and how men use talk to build relationships and their identities. Learn more at sfkiesling.com.New to Proxy?— Try Bisexual Wife Guy — one of the clearest examples of what this show does— Or try The First Ever Extrovert-Introvert Cage Match — another case about what happens when friends have different ideas of what connection looks likeFor episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishawVisit — proxypodcast.comGet in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
SummaryJane Doesn't Like Her Dogs
May 500:49:40Summary readyThe case of the dog trainer who loves her dogs, but doesn't feel close tothem anymore. Proxy is back with new cases every other Tuesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss the next one.Please note: This story contains brief mention of suicidal ideation. If you or someone you know may be considering suicide, contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by dialing 9-8-8, or the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.From the episode: — Jen Blough, LPC — therapist, compassion fatigue educator, and author of To Save a Starfish: A Compassion Fatigue Workbook for the Animal Welfare Warrior — learn about her compassion fatigue certification program and more: www.animalwelfarewellness.comResources on compassion fatigue, pet caregiving, and pet loss:—Compassion fatigue resources from ASPCApro—Professional Quality of Life Scale (ProQOl) — a free self-assessment tool for compassion satisfaction, burnout, and secondary traumatic stress—Pet caregiver burden resources from Insight Animal Behavior Services—Cornell Pet Loss Support HotlineNew to Proxy?— Try Bisexual Wife Guy — one of the clearest examples of what this show does— Or Brian Can't Stop Fact-Checking His Mother-In-Law — when love, duty, and resentment get tangled upFor episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get File Under Feelings, our free newsletter, at proxyhq.org.Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishawVisit — proxypodcast.comGet in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com
SummaryYowei Used to Hide Her Husband Kyle (from Love Letters)
Apr 700:40:21Summary readyNew to Proxy? Start with Bisexual Wife Guy — it’s one of the clearest examples of what this show does.New season starts April 21. In the meantime, here’s a story about a time Yowei found having a boyfriend… embarrassing. Not because of him—because of what it said about her. This story comes from the Love Letters podcast. Listen to other episodes here.
SummaryPresenting: Sisters (with No One Should Believe Me)
Mar 3100:29:50Summary readyWhen Andrea Dunlop's sister was investigated for Munchausen by proxy abuse, it tore apart her family. In this episode of No One Should Believe Me, Andrea tries to understand what happened in her family by talking to a proxy family who went through something similar. Listen to No One Should Believe Me and the latest season here. Stay tuned for new Proxy cases coming April.
SummaryLive Proxy: Ben Doesn't Know His Neighbors (March 31, 1pm ET)
Mar 2700:01:55Summary readyBen's neighbors are right there. So... why is it so hard to actually know them?We're tackling that question live—by finding him a proxy who's figured out how to turn a block of strangers into something more... neighbors.Come watch us try something a little experimental. Tuesday, March 31st at 1pm EST (on Zoom)Patreon members will get the link that morning. If you're not one yet, you can join us here.
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